Butterfly Confessions

2008-12-11T12:32:00.002+08:00

Updates for the past month:

Thanksgiving break from 22nd Nov until 30th Nov:

Washington: 22nd Nov-23rd Nov
New York: 23-28th Nov
Boston: 28-29th Nov

The trip was amazing.I havent had time to update.New York was amazing but I really like boston alot.I stayed with my friend and her fiance in Harvard and it was soooo nice,i like Harvard...such a nice place...other than that,watched Mary Poppins musical in New York.crazy busy city...still preferred boston.washington,didnt see much in washington...

week after thanksgiving:

hell begins
lack of sleep(5 hrs per night maybe less)
final exams
study study

stress stress

Since I've got the job at the bionanotechnology lab,its been work work and more work...learning new things...had a long chat with my mentor about what i should start doing,learn new things,more motivated...

its been crazy...i have never had 2 exams in a day and even better,theyre both my hardest subjects.Introduction to Control Systems and Cells,Tissue and Development.I havent had a decent sleep since last week...arghhhhhhhh

anyhow,have problems about visa and stuff...its been stressing me out...so much shit to deal with...still have to pick up my DS2019 in order to renew my visa...

grrrrrr time to get back to studying..

2008-11-21T07:50:00.006+08:00

im in my thanksgiving mood now..teehee

2008-11-08T01:32:00.003+08:00

OBAMA AS PRESIDENT!!!

We went to Legend's to watch the election night last week and it was amazing!!!I was supposed to go to chicago to see obama make his speech but had too much work to do and so,we ended up in murphys!it was awesome!!!i had the time of my life!!his speech was so moving,I really hope he keeps his word and make the country a better place.80% of the people were supporters of OBAMA!I was there with the austrians,germans and the danish and they were all supporting obama!it was amazing and overwhelming.see how this election will make history,its a once in a lifetime experience to see this!i was so touched and overwhelmed by his speech.

anyway moving on...had exam yesterday and was at murphys last night to chill out...I have planned my thanksgiving break and it starts from washington to new york to boston.I think it's pretty reasonable,im spending not more than 300 on the whole trip +/- other expenses but its pretty good,im saving up a lot.

I've now been accepted to work at the micro and nanotechnology lab to do cardiac stem cell research!im so excited!!will be starting really soon!I've done a few basic stuff like making media for the cells and finding my way around the lab,using fluorescence microscopy.my mentor is teaching me stuff and at the same time,dumping alot of new stuff for me to learn and remember which is good!its been a crazy week...

ive 2 projects and one exam next week so i'll be pretty tied up this weekend.i recently heard a song by a group called Muscles and their song is Ice Cream..lol how cool is that...they have this weird noises in the song and they're an australian band which i havent heard of before.its interesting how the aussies will just tell me,hey this is a good song by an aussie band...woooooo and eccentricity is just what i need for randomness days like these...

ive done some online shopping coz winter is close and im freezing my ass off with this cold weather.one minute its nice and sunny and another it becomes blardy cold!!!i dont understand the logic...anyhow,time to go meet friends for lunch.pretty exciting...have to discuss plans to move out next sem with my friend from france,Amelie...we're probably going to stay somewhere near campus so we dont have to walk so much or wake up too early...students have a streak of Laziness nyehehehe...im so excited!coz its near where i work and it'll be convenient for me...weeeee oh well,time to start heading off...

havent decided what to do for xmas...i'll save it on my next post..but guess what?im 21 wahahaha...ok thats random..neway ttyl

2008-10-28T13:52:00.001+08:00

I went to the ONE REPUBLIC CONCERT after i had an exam today(coz it almost killed me) and it was the most amazing concert ive ever been to here.its soooo good!!
got hooked on this song!

Come Home

[Verse 1]
Hello world
Hope you're listening
Forgive me if I’m young
For speaking out of turn
There’s someone I’ve been missing
I think that they could be
The better half of me
They’re in their own place trying to make it right
But I’m tired of justifying
So i say you’ll..

[Chorus]
Come home
Come home
Cause I’ve been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I’ve ever known
So come home
Oooh

[Verse 2]
I get lost in the beauty
Of everything i see
The world ain’t as half as bad
As they paint it to be
If all the sons
If all the daughters
Stopped to take it in
Well hopefully the hate subsides and the love can begin
It might start now..Yeahh
Well maybe I’m just dreaming out loud
Until then

[Chorus]
Come home
Come home
Cause I’ve been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I’ve ever known
Ever known
So come home
Oooh

[Interlude]
Everything i can’t be
Is everything you should be
And that’s why i need you here
Everything i can’t be
Is everything you should be
And that’s why i need you here
So hear this now

[Chorus]
Come home
Come home
Cause I’ve been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there's a war between the vanities
But all i see is you and me
The fight for you is all I’ve ever known
Ever known
So come home
Come home

2008-10-14T08:11:00.006+08:00

I am missing friends and home alot...

I used to think friends are easy to make but the truth is who in the world will always be there for you.To listen to your thoughts,to be there when you need them,to babble,laugh,talk BS and just be the friends you've never had.It's true friends.The friends who have been there all the while.I miss the moments,the laughs,the tears,the craziness...being here is so different...the people we meet can never replace the ones we left back home..they're always in our thoughts.i know nothing and no one can ever replace that.there is a special bond that will always keep us together.i mean we grew up together,we did so many stupid things together and joke together...fight together(lol,i friend you,i dont friend you) haha...and we lau sai together(haha no la)...

I miss my friends back home alot alot...min,michhhh,may,sha!and i always feel so lonely now whenever i eat my meals...no one to sit there and talk BS with me and make me laugh until i fall off my chair...its this little bits of memories that makes life so God damn good.i will always love you guys.you're like family to me and i know there'll always be a time when we'll meet together again.

family...i miss my mum's home cooked food especially my pork..lol...here got pork but not char siew and siew yok and i miss dim sum...my sister's manjaness...and her company :( and my daddy's lame,nerdy jokes...my mummy bringing me shopping(which is the best) haha...sigh...anyway gotta get back to work...

2008-10-11T00:35:00.002+08:00

Hellowwwww people!

How has life beeeeen?I've been busy with assignments and exams.In fact, I just had my surfaces and colloids exams yesterday and it went pretty alright surprisingly.It was hard studying for it coz we only had a day to study for it.I hope i'll get good results for that paper though.I've to start studying for my next exam next tuesday and Ive NO TIME at all!!!Anyway,updates:

this weekend:
Saturday afternoon:Homecoming game!!!Its a huge thing here in champaign,I dont understand why but its like some celebration or something.Its called Feel the 'Nois but I dont really know why its a big deal here in Illinois.I suppose its Illini Pride or some sort.But yeah,Im excited to see what will be going on at the parade.:)
Saturday night: Chicago Broadway~!! :)
Sunday night: Death cabs for cutie concert
Tuesday: Discussion problem mcb
Tuesday: MCB EXAM 2
Wednesday: HW MSE470 due
Friday: HW GE 320 due

Ok,going to class pretty soon! ttyl

2008-10-01T06:52:00.003+08:00

Hello people,

Long time no update.well let me try and wrap things up fast.Went to west virginia last weekend for 3 days and 2 nights.The drive took us 9 hrs to get there.Went white water rafting.AMAZING!!IT WAS AWESOME!!i had the best time of my life!!it was crazy but so much fun!!!anyway,it was raining the whole weekend and i caught a cold so been sniffling alot.Other than that,have assignments and exams so study study.Going to chicago 2 weeks from now so we'll be able to see whats up over there that they dont have here.haha...anyway,things are ok i guess.miss melbourne a bit,mostly friends.and friends in KL...having meals here alone which im not really used to...americans cling on to their own group which isnt that fun.i met one american today lol...but thats it...ive friends in my classes but we dont interact out of class except my international friends from france.oh well,moving on...have to study..ttyl

2008-09-05T09:08:00.002+08:00

2nd week of university:

Pile of work coming in,time to start slogging again.need to get adjusted to the way they do homework around here.its all about competition mannn but i mean ppl here are nice enough to help out when you have no idea whats going on especially when you have just registered for a course which is totally different from what you expect it to be.anyway,life is good...friends im getting to used to...got scholarship money for studying on exchange!how awesome is that!wooohoooo wonderful!going to apply for extension to a year...will see how that works.anyway time to do some work...ttyl

2008-09-01T04:31:00.003+08:00

I miss home,i miss melbourne,i miss family and friends.

adjusting to a new life here is much tougher than I thought.Am i asking for too much?I wish I knew what it was like to start a new circle again and get used to the conversations,the craziness,the intensity.its fun but its not the same.i need to find a place i belong in and i thought i have but im still wondering is that what i want?i love to immerse in a new environment and new culture...i guess i just have to get used to it.its just a matter of time before i leave again and i'll be sad to leave.lol confusing...anyway im just homesick i miss friends and family...

2008-08-26T09:34:00.004+08:00

Dear readers,

I have just started uni today and it is so different from the lectures in Melbourne.I mean its small,compact and some lectures are conducted in classes which is quite odd.I have met wonderful friends,2 korean friends which i hardly bump into now and an englishman and a german guy,mike and michael.funny blokes but it's really good to see how studious people can be when it comes to education.

so far,orientation week has been crazy.we had like activities almost everyday and it took me a while to get adjusted to the surroundings.it's particularly difficult when people ask me where i'm from.nationality is malaysian but i dont live there anymore so im studying in melbourne at the moment but i live in the middle east.confusing?oh well,when they say oh u came from melbourne,i just nod and say yes yes and explain the whole process again.anyway,its been crazy coz the campus is huge and i get lost all the time.we use buses to get around but now,i realise i need a bike but its too expensive to buy one coz all the cheaps one are sold out.so its best to walk.burn more fat that way.haha

classes has just started and ive already got a test 2 weeks from now eventhough i havent got any study materials yet.insane!i need to get used to the assignment/homework every week so i'll be stuck in my room once again.haha.books here are relatively expensive so i found a website where we can buy cheap secondhand books!wonderful!spent so much on things just for my room.like a kettle,a table lamp(how can they not have the most important thing for studying!!),a fan,a laundry bag,stuff to put my books and junk in,etc.and you know what is so amazing???WE GET SO MANY FREE STUFF DURING ORIENTATION WEEK!!!so far,ive got 3 new shirts and a jumper for free!!!can u believe it???in melb,we had to pay blardy 45 bucks for a jumper!and yeah so im reali surprised we get so many free stuff here.i got a free frisbee and pizza cutter too!haha...unbelievable...wow,im just so amazed!

anyway,im going to look for some things to do like read up on something.ttyl will update soon :)

2008-08-15T02:04:00.002+08:00

wow,life seems so unreal shifting from one place to the next and adapting to different cultures.something new.
not entirely but new.

San francisco was freaking amazing!I have seen so many places which I haven't seen before and travelled around to understand the different cultures and how people interact.It is so different to Aussie culture in a way.It's nice to learn new things.

Champaign is a small town but it's such a nice,quiet and peaceful town.Food here IS AMAZINGLY CHEAP compared to melbourne.You can get A HUGE MASSIVE bowl of fried rice for 6 bucks!i didnt know the portions here were so big.Now i know why obesity is common here.zzzz haha

Anyway,time to go and get some things done.I have so much to write but I dont have time to do all this.ttyl..laterz

2008-07-28T13:30:00.002+08:00

I was in KL on holiday for 3 weeks which passed by so swiftly.I didnt have time to say goodbye to everybody but the most important friends were there to see me off.I'll miss them dearly.It is time to start a new chapter in my life and turn over a new page.

I don't really have time to update everything just yet.There is so much to say but also so much to do.Anyway,till I write again...

2008-07-02T09:45:00.004+08:00

Last night,my friend,Sang Kyu showed me a documentary on North Korea...it was just so sad and awful the way they treated the citizens.It reminded me of how Mao Tze Tung ruled China during the revolution.Insanely mortifying...they worship their leader like God and they have no idea the outside world exist.It was crazy to think that until now,no one dares do anything or go against them or save the people in that country.what the hell are they doing?brainwashed by the leader.they hold the key to world destruction,how many nuclear weapons do they own?crazy...

anyway,i watched sex and the city before that and it was freakingly awesome!arghhh so nice!!but it also shows how friendship remained eventhough they were old,married and with kids haha...funny how that works...cant imagine how life will be at 40 lol...i see my mum PMS everyday,rather not think bout it lol...like mother,like daughter haha..

Liesa has left for home and I won't be able to see her again..who knows maybe in the near future but I guess friends come and go...and i hate goodbyes...

i find it hard to trust people who don't know me long enough or well enough...sometimes i wonder if im being hard headed with myself or it's just how the past changes how you think.there are times i think i should just let things be but other times i would not let myself be influenced or changed by the things around me...
people ask me why is it so hard for you to trust even your close friends.i will say,i have had bad experiences and that's why it will always be a reason i keep a distance.isn't that a good thing?at least you know your boundaries and you have control about how you feel or think.it takes time, i guess.the true friends are always the friends from back home...the ones i started off with from the beginning...it will always be the people who you grew up with,the people you shared most of your memories with and the people who are there for you vice versa.going to a new country means you have to meet new people and do the same thing all over again.i don't really know how I'm supposed to feel,excited,sad,happy?its all mixed feelings.in melbourne,i still feel that there's something missing.there's a gap that hasn't been filled but when i go home,i dont have that gap.i really pray and hope this experience will be one in a million and worth all the effort and perspiration.sometimes we feel that everything we do is never enough to achieve what we want to achieve but i hope it all works out.i'll miss everyone here and i'll miss life as it is but i do hope that as i take this to a new level,there will be experiences gained and memories treasured.not everyone gets a shot at this,its up to you to decide what you want to do with your life and be grateful for what you have.

times like these,it's when you need to make a decision

2008-06-27T09:37:00.003+08:00

Its over!!!finally!!!cant tell you how glad i am that it is over!i've never studied so hard in my life!its amazingly insane...lol its over now...whatever the outcome is,it'll come...but now,its celebration and packing up and flying home...a week before i fly back..need to start packing...well then...time to go...its the day where ive to run errands and stuff...

2008-06-22T23:26:00.002+08:00

What Your Hands Say About You

You are artistic, intuitive, and inspired. You have good people skills.

Flexible and broad minded, you can fit in to any situation. There's no telling where your life will take you.

Consistent and reliable, you like to count on structure and routine in your life.

Your emotions tend to be nervous and potent. Your energy - both positive and negative - deeply impacts your life.

What Do Your Hands Say About You?

You Should Be a Doctor

You are practical, sharp, and very intuitive.

Optimistic and energetic, you are a problem solver who doesn't get discouraged easily.

You are also quite compassionate and caring. You make people feel hopeful.

You're highly adaptable and capable. You do well with almost any curve ball life throws at you.

You do best when you:

- Are always learning new subjects

- Use your knowledge to solve problems

You would also be a good therapist or detective.

What Should You Be When You Grow Up?

What Your Little Black Dress Says About You

You are sexy, outrageous, and daring. You love to push people's buttons.

You are fearless and free spirited. You get people talking... and you don't care what they say about you.

Your style is revealing, trendy, and flirty. You love to look good.

If you were a shoe, you would be: Strappy sandals

The Little Black Dress Test

You Should Learn Swedish

Fantastisk! You're laid back about learning a language - and about life in general.

Peaceful, beautiful Sweden is ideal for you... And you won't even have to speak perfect Swedish to get around!

What Language Should You Learn?

You've Changed 32% in 10 Years

Ah, the past! You may not remember it well - because you're still living in it.

While you've changed some, you may want to update your wardrobe, music collection and circle of friends.

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

2008-06-22T23:11:00.005+08:00

Before I came to uni,I used to think that it'll just be as easy as high school.Straight A's,studying,doing assignments/homework,exams...nah,easy...how wrong was I...first year took a long time adjusting to coz of the culture,the people,the syllabus,the subjects,it was tough...and i was even doubtful about whether i could actually get through this...i dont feel as smart as I used to...truth is,its all hard work man...everyone thinks its freakin easy to score H1s in everything,come back to reality...its not...here,let me take you into the life as a third year uni student(during swotvac):

1. wake up in the morning
2. breakfast
3. study
4. lunch
5. study
6. dinner
7. study
8. sleep
9. in those breaks in between,we have time to do our laundry,talk to parents,settle exchange stuff,check emails,organize things
10. think about holidays

re-emphasize number 10

yes,for some weird reason,i have quite a short attention span,its either thinking about my exchange or thinking bout home...

life as a uni student,life is easy when we want it to be and if we dont have to work hard at all...but laziness will get you nowhere..i decided i hate to be last minute in anything and things have to be in a perfect kind of order or it has to be in an organized position...feel abit like an OCD,perfectionist person...its a disease i tell you!!lol..i need a bigger brain span...homo sapiens are supposed to have the biggest brain capacity!whats this?zzzzz...

i had to study bout lungs and rectum today...zzzz

i cant wait to finish arghhhh...why the hell am i blogging?i need to sleep...

2008-06-20T14:06:00.006+08:00

2 more weeks before i'll be back in KL enjoying my nasi lemak/maggi goreng/bak kut teh zzz...need to lose weight before i balik haha...well ive been sitting on my butt for the last 2 weeks and ppl will only see me at breakfast,lunch or dinner...otherwise i will be in my room studying or studying in the tute room..living the life of a real nerd...hopefuli work isnt like that...being a lab rat...zzz NOOOOOOO

cant wait to finish...2 down,one more to go...pharmacology was tough!omg i had 2 and a half weeks to study for this paper!!and it was freakin hard,luckily i wasnt the first to say that...im not going to expect H1 for this one sigh...i had it all figured out in my head that i was going to TAME the paper...as quoted by nelson...TAME THE PAPER...zzz lol...neway im going to have a nice sleep...not that i didnt have enough last night,just had a headache from studying too much...trust me,this long awaited holiday will be so worth it!

ok,about my US thing,im really excited to fly to US primarily san fran and chicago but the whole problem is THE SUBJECTS!!!SUCH A PAIN IN THE A**!firstly,my study plan was all worked out,i was going to do TISSUE ENGINEERING and CELL AND TISSUE ENGINEERING LAB!THOSE ARE MY MAJOR SUBJECTS WHICH I WILL BE SPECIALIZING IN...im trying to plead the course coordinator to offer them during the fall just coz they DECIDED to remove it for next sem!WTH?I wanted to go there because of this!IDIOTS!so upsetting and pissing off...waste of time,effort,money,energy sorting out the subjects and they tell me ITS NOT OFFERED!anyway its frustrating to juggle this and study for exams at the same time...hopefuli it'll work out and THEY WILL ACCEPT THAT THEY'RE LOSING A GOOD STUDENT WHO IS WILLING TO DO WHAT IT TAKES TO GET IT!lol,well im going to sleep it off now...have to start studying for the next paper...cellular basis of disease...PAPA AND MUMMY SHUDNT CALL ME WHEN IM STUDYING FOR EXAMS...

2008-06-14T15:32:00.002+08:00

This is video taken some time ago when we were so bored with our lives and had nothing better to do.We asked James,"hey,how much leg hair do you have"?. *James lifts up his jeans and shows us* and I,being the mean mean person as I always am,smack a strip of ready made wax on his leg. TA-DA!

He was like ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH,NOOOOOOOOO....haha...well then,Kat had to remove it nicely and well,as you can imagine,the strip came off,leaving a rectangular shaped patch which was smooth and nice.Haha...no further comments...

Pharmacology!!!I need a bigger brain capacity to remember all these stuff...zzzz

study time...

2008-06-10T08:39:00.004+08:00

2008-06-05T13:10:00.004+08:00

US,here I come.I'm still waiting for the package to arrive melbourne.I've checked the exchange website and I've been accepted by University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign.I spoke to an exchange student from that uni whose in IH at the moment and he told me the engineering courses are so freaking hard coz its one of the best schools in US.cool man!!

i hope i'll get an email from them soon so I can start planning my trip to US and also figure what I wanna do before sem starts.Visa first though.I need to make an appointment with the US embassy in KL...

neway,exams is approaching.have another 2 weeks before it starts.feel slightly behind but i need a break from studying seriously.its been constant studying the whole sem.i need me time.lol

i had a farewell party last week and we set up a projector in the Greycourt Theatrette room showing all the latest music videos.It was fun but tiring lol.lots of effort to make things work.haha...well then,time to work...so tired man...

I've taken a liking to a song by Rihanna,Take a Bow.

its awesome! new CD for praise and worship,you should listen to clinging to the cross,stand in awe and what else can i say...awesome songs...

I want to sport the pixie haircut!!!check out the pics...let me know what u think :)

2008-05-29T21:35:00.000+08:00

Swotvac has just started for me and I'm organizing my pre-farewell party eventhough things arent confirmed yet which is pretty weird.I've invited ex IHers and IHers to the event.Chiau Lin and Liesa are combining this farewell with me.And it is a strictly non alcoholic event.How sad is that.Well the head and deputy head of college are pretty strict about having any people around under the influence of alcohol.Sigh.Neway have to start studying for pharmacology and CBD soon since swotvac has just begun.Time to be studious and motivated again if i can.sigh...

20th June - Cellular and Molecular Pharmacology
26th June - Cellular Basis of Disease

Time to sleep zzzzzz

2008-05-23T07:22:00.002+08:00

Ok,i get lots of question bout my love life(i dont have one) and why I don't want to get involved in a relationship eventhough I'm old enough to( im 21,what difference does it make?)

Anyway,i'll tell you the 10 reasons WHY I'M NOT INTERESTED IN RELATIONSHIPS( in general):

1. Men are disgusting,they have dirty habits (digging their noses, picking skin from their feet and wiping it on ppl's face)
2. Men don't have table manners (table etiquette, they spit everywhere and leave the table without cleaning up)
3. Where are the gentlemen?I don't see any.
4. They treat girls like crap.They make me sick. bluek
5. I'm just too demanding and I like to be the dominant one in a relationship.I like to do things my way and I like to be in control of my own things.I'm pretty defensive too.
6. I'm just not interested coz i havent found the right person yet (does that make sense?)
7. I prefer my own freedom and I don't have time for all this lovey dovey stuff
8. I've got more important things to think about such as STUDIES (priorities first!)
9. I'm only 21!I like to have fun and hang out with my friends.
10. Life is short,enjoy the best of it while you still can.

"Boys are stupid,throw rocks at them" lol

2008-05-23T07:10:00.001+08:00

Exams are approaching.I've a midsem test on monday worth 20% which is cellular basis of disease.im getting there.i hope i'll get it right by monday!

Exam timetable: Exams start on the 20th of june,cellular and molecular pharmacology and end on 26th of june - cellular basis of disease.

So far,ive been locked in my room everyday studying.or at least attempt to.yes,i do try.
i can't wait to go back to KL!

Things i wanna do when i reach KL:
1. MAMAK FOOD - maggi goreng yummmmmmm
2. BAK KUT TEH
3. new shopping malls, MV and pavillion and new wing of sunway pyramid
4. HAVE TO GET MY US VISA DONE FIRST ASAP (if im going)
5. Exercise and lose weight
6. Definitely meet up with friends
7. Spend time with family!
8. Go to raub to see relatives and grandma
9. im not sure about church in KL -___-" (u know what i mean)
10. spend as much time in KL as possible coz we won't be coming back that often

I'm going to get a haircut before i leave for KL...i want the pixie haircut!!gonna get it done here before i go back :) yippeeeeeeee

2008-05-14T11:37:00.000+08:00

wow its been a long long time since ive updated my blog.

updates:

Biomaterials exam over,handed in prac and project.
Cafe is over!thank God,can do more work now.
Have midsem test in 2 weeks worth 20% not enough time to study.need to rush
ppl keep bugging me which is irritating.thats the problem living in IH,ppl just dont get it.sometimes priorities are more important than wasting time talking crap.

hate gossip,theres so much in IH...cant wait to move out

US..still waiting for acceptance letter.still praying that i hope it gets through.theres only 2 ppl applying for illinois.have to apply for visa which takes 2 months.health insurance,travel insurance,etc.

so much to catch up on.study time..

2008-04-22T07:24:00.002+08:00

dead dead tired...exhausted...

been studying for Cellular Basis of Disease...had to cover the material from last year and this year just coz we didnt do the prerequisites from last year...stressed like mad...lol but it was ok in the end..hopefuli i passed...been so out of it...

crap...biomaterials exam is next week,i just dont know what the hell is going on...well of course we have to start studying but how about our other commitments in pharmacology etc?its been too much just for a subject...its like being hammered multiple times for different subjects lol...

time to go...too much stuff to do...i need to figure out how to do meditation coz i'd probably NEED IT!

2008-04-16T07:20:00.001+08:00

it has been a busy week.

studying and rehearsals.study study study

theres an engineering careers expo on thursday organized by young engineers australia.its a good chance to meet biomedical companies and look for part time/vacation jobs.cant wait!!

other than that,IH ball is on friday.I bought a NON ALCOHOLIC ticket.THATS RIGHT,u better believe it.ive got a test on monday.i've finished studying for it but i've to do my tutorials and revise again and again.Im pretty freaked out but so so tired.ive been waking up 7.30am everyday eventhough i sleep reali late.crazy biological clock.

been studying like mad.yesterday was the only time i went to the city lol.i convinced my friend to get her belly pierced.hilarious.it was quite freaky watching it happen.

anywayz,got tute in half an hour.just thought i'd update.

wushu and hairspray practices have been quite intense.

2nd cafe auditions are on sunday.sigh

guess whose sending a birthday card to qatar?

2008-04-12T09:13:00.001+08:00

Wow I didnt realise that this is my 300th post!wooohooooo 3 is my lucky number so im happyyyyy hahaha...life is good

ive been busy studying for my subjects,its been crazy,wicked,insane,need i say more?especially for pharmacology and cellular basis of disease,we didnt do the prerequisites last year and they just dump us in the subject and not help us with extra tutes or consultations etc.its been tough.

other than that,ive got a group project on tissue engineering.we're planning to use polymer scaffolds to build a cartilage for the ear.still have to sit down and discuss and look at it...havent done enough to actually decide which design we have to come up with and how we're going to build it...

on top of that,ive cafe acts to do...wil be performing wushu,hairspray and a malaysian dance.not much on the P.ramlee malaysian act but others are going alright.im still struggling with wushu since ive just got a belly piercing,i cant jump too much...lol

we had scholars dinner that day and i left after the main course to do work...and gues what happened?a parade of tipsy/drunk ppl came and crash into my room.i mean i have nothing against them but i was trying to study!anyway they left at 12am and i had to wake up at 7am the next morning to get my studying done.my brain is just overload with CBD stuff,not fun.

next week is IH ball,3 days before my test!ive decided that im not going to the afterparty,even better...leave right after the ball...thank goodness,ive studied about half the lectures...still have another 8 more to go...

so ive decided that this year is a studious year since its my third year and 3 is my lucky number.ive decided i need to look for internships and clinical placements.

work work and more work...time to nerd again...btw reena's birthday is coming up and im still thinking bout what to get for her...haha...alright,ttyl will update after the test

2008-03-31T21:48:00.001+08:00

The grampians was awesome!!amazingly awesome,i had so much fun!!it was so good,worth going there again!i love it!!!

anyway im too lazy to post up photos so just check facebook lol.

been pretty free during the easter break and was supposed to catch up with studies.ended up doing other things instead like cooking and spending lots of time with friends.

i just got my first assignment today!finally!i dont know why im so excited about it,doesnt make sense but im actually pumped!

well then,cafe is coming up and i may be doing a few acts like wushu and hairspray.theme is airline 60s.lol.pretty limited but ppl are already starting to do stuff.ive pulled out of athletics!omg,so relieved in a way coz i can concentrate on work and say NO!things have changed this year,ppl say ive changed alot but not sure for better or worse.hopefully for the better.

ive stopped clubbing and all that stuff.im not an alkie anymore,pretty shocking for some ppl.i wonder why lol.have been hanging out with the freshers alot.actually,i kinda enjoyed it this year.i got to know ppl better and kinda got to know myself better.its just the way things happen.ive learnt to be more responsible and to take charge,get a headstart in things.be more organized in terms of work(my room isnt though,dont ask why).i feel more motherly or ive been told im more motherly lol.big deal.zzzz

im so over the gossip/rumours around IH.people cant get enough of it and its a blardy waste of time.why do ppl do that?who does that?what do u gain out of it?self satisfaction in dissing people just coz theyre not so perfect?ive got news for u!u're not that perfect neither!woohooo...anyway,im just defending a good friend whose really nice and who doesnt deserve all that college crap.this is one of the cons living in college,ppl just make up stuff u dun even know.cant wait to move out next year.its time to MOVE ON man...seriously...

and ive been asked about going to US...at first,I was so enthusiastic and excited about it but now,im just like yeah yeah,i dont really know if i'd want to go...its just i'd like to stay in my comfort zone and i enjoy it here.ive met people that are really nice and trustworthy who dont come by very often.people who arent dissing bout u and talking shit bout u 24/7 and people who respect u and understand whats on ur mind.its people like these who are worth trusting and worth being there for.i guess it made me learn something.i still treasure the friends ive lost and of course,you cant replace them but at the same time,i'll treasure the time spent with those whom im close to now.i mean once you graduate,everyone will go their separate ways and you'll never get the chance to really know someone if all you hear is crap talk of what other ppl say about them.not worth it right?take a chance now and be the friend you can be while you still can.we'll never know one day,you'll never get to see them again or say the things that you want to.

im very contented with life right now.that's all i've to say.life is good.

2008-03-21T06:08:00.005+08:00

I'll be going to ballarat today to explore some gold mines and tomorrow we'll be heading out to the GRAMPIANS!!!woohooooo...if you would like to know more about it,go to www.grampianstravel.com.au.We've got accomodation for 10 ppl at grampians backpackers and it costs only 22aud a night per person.but organizing all this is pretty stressful!im just annoyed by ppl not turning up to meetings and not taking the initiative to find out whats the plan.anyway,i'm going to leave today so whatever.dont care la.wil be away from friday to monday.

other than that,will post up pictures of the foam party and outing with mich and swee hoe.ive got to start packing up and cleaning my room.

2008-03-11T07:20:00.006+08:00

MOOMBA FESTIVAL,COMMENCEMENT DINNER,BDAY,BEACH DAY!

2008-03-08T08:19:00.002+08:00

21st birthday celebration:

We went to have korean BBQ at seoul house along russell street.Awesome place!Had dinner yum yum and went to lion's after that lol.Came back around 1am ish.So that was good.

My new timetable is not too bad.I have one class on tuesday and friday!weeeeeee so thats good...eheheheh

I guess there's more work to do later.ttyl

2008-02-28T15:58:00.000+08:00

You Should Get A Butterfly Tattoo

Sweet and sassy

For you, tattoos are a thing of beauty - not toughness

What Tattoo Should You Get?

Your Aura is Blue

Spiritual and calm, you tend to live a quiet but enriching life.

You are very giving of yourself. And it's hard for you to let go of relationships.

The purpose of your life: showing love to other people

Famous blues include: Angelina Jolie, the Dali Lama, Oprah

Careers for you to try: Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, Counselor

What Color Is Your Aura?

You Are Destined to Be Thin

Even if you aren't thin right now, you have great habits that will ensure you're thin for most of your life.

You have a great relationship with food and eating. Don't change a thing.

Are You Destined To Be Overweight?

2008-02-26T22:19:00.004+08:00

reality hit me today...

today we had a surprise party for shrinks and it hit me so bad...so thats why im writing this to let it out...it reminded me of my birthday when it was the last time i saw nadirah.yes,nadirah from sri inai.the awesome,cool chick, cute one who makes everyone smile.i tried putting on a straight face and i did...

i didnt want ppl to know what i was feeling...the person who makes ppl laugh..crazy little kid...the truth is that i still cant accept the fact...and finally when she found me on facebook and was posting walls once in a while,i get the devastating news...but crying does help...shes not going to suffer through the pain anymore and thats a great thing...

i just wish i could have said more...or known her better...or spend more time with the inaians when i could have...sometimes you wish you could have been there but thats the best you can do...i havent seen her since my birthday and now,it will be a memory to treasure for a long time...that ive got to meet a great person and she'll be remembered for a long long time...i'll miss her presence just like in sri inai last time...god bless...hugs and kisses

*flowers for you*

2008-02-24T21:21:00.002+08:00

O week has just started and all the new freshers are coming in.Pretty different now.things have changed and im still adjusting to my new surroundings and there are too many new faces i've to remember(or not)...

anyway got to get some things done...go to uni,get my journal and sort up my subjects etc...weird eyh?neway time goes by too fast..im goin to start uni next week and im a little bit excited.

so far,havent done much.just the study plan for uni of michigan.i pray things will work out.

alright then,time to sleep...long day 2moro

2008-02-22T22:22:00.002+08:00

Settling down in Melbourne

Haven't done much so far.Looking around for reasonable contacts and also a school bag but i still have a week.Have to unpack and stuff.Weather here is pretty weird.Its been hot and cold at the same time like 4 seasons in a day,the usual la.

Have been busy doing my exchange study plan.Ive to hand it up by monday so i've to rush and get it done quickly and my mum keeps telling me to UNPACK BUT IVE GOT MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO FIRST DURHHHH

anyway,havent really been around to say hello to freshers and be friendly.Ive been stuck in my room most of the time bla bla.I hope that I'll get things settled soon.

By the way,I finally got to watch Jodhaa Akbar today!!It was from 8.30pm to 12am!!!long movie!!but so worth it!!!i really love it!!!mannnnn HRITHIK ROSHAN IS MY HERO!!HE'S SO HAWTTTT!!!SO MACHO,MASCULINE,GENTLEMAN...ZZZ AND THE LIST GOES ON...hes mine mine mine!!Wahahahhaaha love the movie man!!so niceeeeeeeee and can drool over hrithik roshan!!wahahahah...*ooogles*

got another day to do my exchange 2moro in the morning so thats gotta be done.ive gtg sleeeeep now :)

2008-02-21T01:39:00.003+08:00

TO ALL MALAYSIANS OUT THERE

This article was taken from the age which is an australian newspaper.Not too sure when it was published but this shows what a disgrace Malaysia is to other countries.

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2007/11/20/1195321781628.html

Do you still think Malaysia is democratic?

What is going to happen in the next elections?

All i can say is this is how Australia views our country.No further comments.Just passing it on.

2008-02-17T14:23:00.001+08:00

Going back to melb today

I feel like my luggage is going to be overweight.my limit is 20kg and I already have 28kg!!!arghhhhhh and i dont know how many hand carry luggages i can bring...

dilemma....i cant wait to go to sg and melb...

lots of oink oink for me hehehe and duty free alco

anyway im going to miss the gurls...

and my familyyyyyyy for sure

time to get back to work got lots to do!

2008-02-16T22:31:00.003+08:00

me bored...going back to melb sooooon very soooooooon

alcohol and pork waiting for me wakakaka...i want oink oink hehehe

2008-02-15T19:03:00.002+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL!

Valentine's day was spent grocery shopping with mum in carrefour and window shopping in villagio.At night,we had dinner at a shanghai chinese restaurant which wasn't great but at least we had a great family time.Then,Uncle Rahim joined us and we had coffee at coffee bean.Overall,valentine's day was spent with family and that was really nice and thoughtful.i mean i havent really spent v-day alone since 3 years ago but i guess its different now and things change.I'm happy though haha...ive to start packing to go back to melb!and im really excited!so many things i'd like to do!!3 more days weeeeeeeee

2008-02-14T22:43:00.014+08:00

Overall i've met a few friends whom I will really miss...Gayathree and Sheen,my two gurls who are ever so sweeeeeeet and wont stop smiling :) such cuties...and haydar,the crazy ass dude from iraq,such a nice fella too..he and sheen shud hook up lol teehee...*giggles*

I'll definitely miss silk painting coz i enjoyed the classes so much.it was abithard to understand my teacher's accent coz she speaks in this south african accent.She's british but has lived in south africa since she was 8.I have completed 3 paintings and i've sent one of them to be framed.Anyway I will miss her too.She's such a sweet lady :)

Clubbing here - nothing that im going to miss.

Food here - not so great neither.

Sand dunes - friggin awesome.will miss sandboarding and riding the buggies.

Shopping - yes,I'll miss shopping here but i can still do that in melb :)

and last but not least, Family of course.

2008-02-14T22:26:00.002+08:00

CNY IN DOHA,QATAR

First day of CNY was very interesting.Well,my parents didn't have any plans and did not plan this CNY dinner carefully,maybe because we didn't have the festive mood for CNY.We decided to just walk in and try our luck.Unfortunately,all the chinese restaurants were fully booked.So we had dinner at the international buffet,movenpick.
It was ok,just that most of the food was western and abit disappointing.

Anyway,mum decided to invite a few family friends over for dinner on saturday and sunday night.Sheen and her family came over on saturday night.Lishan and I had to help mum cook and prepare/set up the tables etc.We live in a small apartment so it was quite squishy but I was glad and happy by the end of it!!!On sunday night(jeng jeng jeng jeng), mum invited this qatari fella which was a bit weird.Anyway,on cny,he kept on talking bout his mum's death and how he buried her etc.I mean it's really not nice to mention about sad things on cny!Its bad luck!!i believe abit in all the hocus pocus chinese tradition so i didnt really like that.Su mei and family came so did gayathree and her bro.It was a good turnout and i had so much food!Family reunions are the best thing on cny!

I'm going back in 3 days time and I'm excited somehow not only coz i get to start studying again but also i get to settle all my other things like the exchange and the uni books etc.this experience has been awesome but i think its only nice to come here once and thats it...3 months is too long for me lol.i'll update on my next post bout the things ive done here so far...

2008-02-13T13:39:00.002+08:00

Exchange to US

I've got an email from the exchange advisor and I didn't get to go into any of the University of California campuses coz the requirement is probably like 80 and above.So the lady told me to change my first and second preferences and I've decided on Uni of Michigan and Uni of Pennsylvania.Now I'm not sure if I'll get any of those two though.I'm still trying and I won't give up until my spirits are broken.At least I'm trying really hard.I feel so hopeless now because I've been given so many encouragements and hopes and support by so many people.It's just I've been wanting this for so long since my first year of uni.I've always wondered what it's like to study in the US.I should have done that a long time ago but I'm not regretting anything now.I just feel that perhaps i should have done better but how can you when this course alone is already difficult?but maybe i shud have gotten better grades.I do hope that i will still be able to make it to either one of those two new unis i've chosen.I just seek guidance from Him to show me the way.If it's not His will,I think I will leave it up to Him.There's a reason to everything that happens and I will just wait for the opportunity to come as well as seek it.

I won't give up now eventhough I'm sad and devastated.I'll keep on trying until there's nothing more to hope for.There is always a next time someday.But I won't stop trying.

2008-02-11T13:30:00.000+08:00

Chinese New Year celebration

first day - international buffet at movenpick hotel.was a bit disappointed coz it was mostly western and not chinese(lol,durh)

second day - clubbing at diplomatic club.full details later

third day - dinner with sheen and family and uncle rahim

fourth day - dinner with su mei and family,gayathree and her bro,and mohammed,a qatari guy we just met at the shopping mall...zzzz

fifth day - city centre with gayathree

sixth day - final silk painting class

seventh day - bowling with friends

ok and the list goes on..but its one more week before i go back to melb!!woohooooooo

anyway about the clubbing night...too much to say...ive never met so many desperate men in my life!!!!i feel violated and abit freaked out!why?coz the moment u walked in,there are men standing there asking you to join them at their table and offer to buy you drinks...all you have to do is say no...i did many times!truth be told that men here are looking for wives because they cant find one here so clubbing is the easiest way to look for their future spouse...which is silly...its an over 21 event so most of them were pretty old...main highlights of the event,music was so-so...crowd was alrite..company was good and ppl were despo...there was this black french guy who said oh,i reali like you and i want you to call me(gave me a piece of paper with his number on it) and i was like,you dont even know me and im not interested in anyone right now(in other words,bugger off!)...hes so pushy and i got so turned off,i just said i had to go...seriously,i wasnt interested at all coz he didnt even understand what the hell i was saying...he doesnt understand english,yet he had the nerve to come up to me,ask me to dance,buy me a drink and ask me out...what the hell?!!i said i was goin back to australia soon and he didnt understand what the fark i was telling him...a big NO NO...but anyway,didnt even bother to layan him after that...then there was this other middle eastern dude who couldnt stop hassling me...to be honest,im there to have fun and dance with my girls without ppl pushing me around and hassling me...i mean there were bout 7 to 8 men who came up,asking me where i was goin to sleep tonight(wtf,that was so damn sick!),whether i would like a drink(they had probably spiked it)bla bla bla...omg,the nerve!!!at least i know what clubs here are for...not for ppl to have fun but for ppl to pick up and have sex...oh so thats why its over 21!!its just too sick to be true..zzzz such a turn off!

another story...we met this qatari guy at a shopping mall,city centre.ok,so we've just met him and he works at my dad's friend's company so ok we decided to invite him over for cny dinner.so he came over la and makan etc...then he bought my sis and I a YSL perfume each!!!and i was like,no i cant accept this!!how can he buy us a perfume when he doesnt even know us and it was just the second time he has seen us since the encounter in the shopping mall.it was pretty damn awkward,i can tell you that.i was abit agitated,didnt really know what to say.my mum kept saying oh,hes a decent guy,hes smart,rich,a computer engineer who works at an american company and btw,hes 27.what is she trying to say?before he left,he kissed my hand and that was even more weird!!!my whole family just looked and said nothing.we were all too shocked.i avoided his gaze the whole time he was there.i think he needed ppl to talk to him because he wanted attention.but i'll still say no.

and so,i was abit out of it recently.not sure whether i was shocked or surprised.maybe the word for it is overwhelmed by all this.never had to face this kind of situations before.i mean i've already made it clear that i'm not interested in guys.not for now and not for a long time.i just dont want to get involved and its inappropriate to be with people you dont even know.and my family knows i have my self value to that.thats important to keep.i've learnt some important things here and how to deal with them.i guess thats part of being 21.

btw,my future husband is CHRIS EVANS!!coz he so HAWT,JUICY AND YUMMY!!! teeheeee

2008-02-07T13:28:00.000+08:00

I've been looking for a school bag to bring to uni.u know those big bags that can fit anything.
books,laptop,lab coat and equipments,pencil case,etc...

i need opinions!!let me know what u think... :)

2008-02-07T13:13:00.000+08:00

SAND DUNES IN SEALINE,QATAR

On Chinese New Year's eve,we went to the sand dunes in sealine.
It was so awesome man!!omg,it was the first time we went sandboarding,go on the buggies and camel riding.i had the best time of my life man!!!wooohooooo so here are some pics.

2008-02-05T05:15:00.000+08:00

VALENTINE TAG

Is valentine's day important to you?
yeah to celebrate it with my family and friends..its not always for couples you know

Do you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend?
hmm...no

How long have you been in a relationship with him/her?
i m single...

Do you have a crush?
i'm not exactly sure,to be honest.it's complicated

What do you think of him/her?
he's funny,artistic and confusing

What is the best Valentine's Day Celebration have you ever had?
haven't had one that i would call the best yet.

What type of guy/girl you like?
too perfect - someone charming,smart,witty,artistic,musically talented,a gentleman,soft spoken,understanding,supportive,and the list goes on

What is your perfect Valentine's day?
somewhere by the beach to watch the sunset while having a glass of champagne and a bouquet of beautiful white lilies :D

What do you want for your valentine's day?
to be with someone i love(in future)

Who do you wish to see on that day?
my loved one,of course

Do you believe in TRUE LOVE?
yes absolutely

2008-02-05T04:46:00.000+08:00

its again almost 12am here(insomnia strikes) and my mind seems to wander off to my memories in KL...

so many things to say,so many words cant describe how i feel...lol

leaving KL was one of the toughest challenges for me

not only was I moving to a new place and a new environment but i was also leaving behind my most precious treasures,my memories,my longtime friends,my loved ones...

it is the hardest thing for me to do...to make newfound friends in a country so foreign to you than anywhere else in the world...it is just so tough to be able to make or force yourself to make new friends..the truth is its not that i dont want to but im just not ready to face the fact that i may not see my friends again...

dad told me we may not be going back to KL in a very long time and i wanted to deny it and make him say that its not true eventhough i know it is and i wont convince myself any longer...its hard to believe the truth when we try not to and when we dont want to...

its really hard to make friends with people when you're not ready to...people are different and ive learnt to accept that...but i really miss my friends back home and no one can replace that...as defensive as i may be,i will always tell my parents that nothing can replace what can never be found...ive found peace and serenity with their company...

i miss the laughs i used to have with ikhsan,alvin,lava,chanduru,sasi and edmund...the crazy jokes we throw at each other..the insults and stupid things we would say...idiots we may be but we will still be like a family

the girls,may,min and sha...the craziness,the wackiness can never be compared to anythin else and i'll never exchange those memories for even the biggest treasure...the laughs and tears...unforgettable

the gossip and stories that we laugh at..becky and steph...the names we call each other haha...prog...

kim,min,yen...our team...the hangout places we go to,the shops...the girly talk...

moments have passed but memories have stayed...can't be gone too far now can it?

being here taught me things that i would never realise elsewhere...all i can think bout is spending more time with them when i could have...there were more things to say,more things to do...every minute and second could have gone without saying the right words yet i didnt make use of it...i miss the moments...that's all i can say

how i wish i could go back to my motherland and see the people who made me who i am and who are important to me...

they say friends come and go but i dont believe that...what if you go and you can never see them again?

i do tell myself everyday that i will see my friends again.i will try my best...

it is really difficult to live in a place friendless and worse still,no church to revive your spiritual growth.

i've learnt to trust what's best for me.for i know that not anyone can be trusted no matter how miserable and sad you may be.there's nobody you can depend on but yourself.that's what ive learnt here.

at least i wont be coming back here again and i hope that i've gained something out of this to make myself a better person.

(I Will Remember You by Ryan Cabrera)

2008-02-05T01:58:00.000+08:00

5 things found in my room
1. paintings
2. papyrus drawings from egypt
3. accessories
4. heart shaped garfield from lavaniya
5. my baby white seal called flutterby,bday gift from my friends in melb!

5 things I've always wanted to do
1. speak mandarin and french fluently
2. travel to italy,france,greece,russia,spain,turkey
3. dance - belly dancing,latin dances(salsa,tango and rhumba)
4. read books on world's greatest history
5. spend more time on art

5 things found in my bag
1. my jacket and scarf
2. lip balm and gloss
3. eye solution
4. wallet
5. notebook

5 things found in my wallet
1. student ID
2. IC
3. cards
4. receipts
5. money

5 things I am currently into
1. painting
2. reading
3. shopping
4. slow,classical songs
5. mix and match clothes for mum

5 things I would like to do in future:
1. help the poor and needy
2. help my family and friends
3. make a change
4. make a difference
5. be articulate and outspoken(not afraid of public speaking)

2008-02-05T01:25:00.000+08:00

SUNDAY
Royal Plaza
-shopped at terranova,so amazingly good!i love that brand arghhhh coz all the winter stuff was on sale and we bought so many things!!spent 2 hours in the shop!!lol

MONDAY
City Centre
-walked around with auntie Aini and her daughter,Sophie and went hunting for gifts...shopped for a bit

TUESDAY
-Villagio with Gayathree
-silk painting class

WEDNESDAY
Sand Dunes at Sealine.Friggin awesome man...sandboarding,ride camels and buggies...beautiful scenery overlooking saudi arabia

THURSDAY
return books to lishan's school and borrow more.haha

FRIDAY
-Diplomatic Club for a function

SATURDAY
-dinner with Dr Sivam and family

2008-02-03T02:39:00.000+08:00

so far,ive done all the colouring and its completed!so happy!decided to draw a seahorse and colour more haha...but ive had a few blunders here and there..had to redo the eyes etc...lol...stil not perfect but at least i had something to kill time

2008-02-03T02:06:00.000+08:00

being here for 3 months really woke me up...

for some reason

I really really miss my friends...

I'll be celebrating CNY and valentine's day here without them...

some people leave footprints in your heart and they can never be forgotten...

2008-02-01T14:37:00.000+08:00

Yesterday night,Lishan,sheen and I went to watch enchanted!it was sooooo cute!!it was nice!!i loved it!!so cool!i think it was funny!!

krispy kremes opening today...i really want to go...i mean just to check it out but u know...who knows whats happening there

anyway its 1st of feb which means in 17 days i'll be goin back to melb!!!wooooohoooooo

2008-01-28T04:44:00.000+08:00

its 12am and im still awake..the clock is still ticking and ive been researching on job options in qatar after i graduate...interesting,i havent found any section on biomedical engineering as a field..instead,its called biotechnology or biochem...i suppose theyre bout the same but anyway,im just exploring my prospects..who knows i'll end up working here(dat would be depressing) but hey i'll get paid in US dollars...wahahah

ive another 2 more years till we all throw our hats in the air and expose ourselves to the hell of the working world which is good in a way coz we get to gain really good experiences and how bitchy people can be when they're at each other's necks dealing with each other's money/life etc.im looking forward to seeing and believing what i hear.learning new things will not always be my middle name or so i hope.my mum is already questioning my concerns and worry about jobs and all coz ive been thinking alot about it and u know where am i gona work in future?what am i goin to be?what would i be doing?will i lead people or sit behind and watch?im curious to know what is going to happen next.and i think this year will give me the answer to that.

internship/clinicals...it sounds rather boring and uninteresting to me.but im excited to learn something new.something out of the ordinary.something we have to deal with in real life situations when we have to think out of the box and not apply just any everyday knowledge if we're risking people's lives.

though this may be the case,i'm still very curious and intrigued by the fact that i want to save people's lives.not as in be the doctor but assist the doctor but as to how much and to what extent we'll be helping in handling problems,that is another question that still sticks to my head.

my mind is filled with complicated things and trying to answer every question that pops up is rather difficult to handle.in a month's time,i'll be 21 and that means growing up,turning over a new leaf and getting down to business.i do believe that ethical situations like dealing with patients and being behind the doctors is rather a challenge than a solution.

and to the question everyone asks,why do you want to do what you're doing?why do this?why not something u reali love like art etc?

truth is its about compassion.its about saving other people's lives.its about breakthroughs.its not about money,money,money all the time.is that what everyone thinks bout 24/7?money is the solution to everything?wrong...it cant buy love,it cant buy happiness but it can make a living and run errands.

all that i do know that i want to do this because it's my calling.it's God's calling.it's not about me all the time.it's bout lives.it's bout changing the world to make it a better place for everyone whose living in it.my dad almost died of a heart attack and without stents,he wouldnt be walking like a free man now which i am eternally grateful of because it's what i think made everything possible.

there is always a solution to a problem and nothing is impossible.but ive already have ideas in my mind,to make things,to create things.people have been telling me this and that,what they want to be done.new lungs,new kidneys,new this,new that,etc.what if i can give it to them and make them happy?

its easy for me to say but its not simple to do.i believe i've worked hard and i've come a long way to be here.to be where i am.to say this in an open mind.i've already passed 2 years of uni with much difficulty but im still standing here for what i believe is right.

long before i started this course,i doubted myself.i didnt have that confidence to think i would succeed in this.i didnt believe that i would last or go on.but i now believe that i've come a long way not because i didnt believe i could but because i had the support behind me.

and to see my dad work hard for me,i can never let him down even after that incident.i can never see him in that pain again.its me he worked so hard for and i cant let him down.that's why i can never accept failure.i haven't which proves something.that i can make him proud and make me proud.

a little bit of arrogance and stupidity put me in my place and with that,i lost a few precious friends.people always say that when "u lose some,u gain some" and i believe that it isnt true all the time.though i did gain trustworthy ones,i still missed the ones i've lost.sometimes we have to lose the people we cared about before we understand ourselves better.i wish i could have turned back time to tell them that i really treasured them as a friend and that their friendship meant a lot to me.but well,i hope they know who they are.

its true i can be very cynical and too straightforward at times but that's me.i say it to the face and even if it hurts someone,i do try not to say it in such an awful manner but i try to make my point across.i never want to offend anyone but i always say it from the heart and what i believe is right.i dont pretend how i feel and pretend nothing happened.i let others know that this is what im thinkin bout,this is what i should do,im truthful and im not lying to you.i cant do that to my friends.it hurts when they dont understand why u had to say it.i still love em.

in 2 years time,im going to be freed...ive to work to make a living and im going to see what's going to happen.Only God knows.

but till then,alot of changes have been made within me,the core of my soul.people will not understand this.but they soon will know why.

sometimes changes are inevitable.make a change.take a chance.

i'll be off to sleep now.it has been a long day.

2008-01-27T06:56:00.000+08:00

My celebrity look alikes

2008-01-27T05:51:00.000+08:00

I've been watching alot of Ghost Whisperers and Hell's Kitchen.

I love Hell's Kitchen mannnnnnnn

Gordon Ramsay is damn freaking funny.He's a genius man.I know he's really harsh with the cooks but let's face it,if no one is going to tell them,who will?He is really straightforward and says it to their face.but also he can be really nice like he let the chinese guy rest and stuff.hey,he's not that bad.he's mean but truthful.It is just so crazy to watch them on screen,so stressful.I've never seen anything like that in my life.and there are just so many bleeps in the show,ive lost count.they should have a swearing jar so whenever he curses,he should put like 2bucks in the jar and collect them(in the end,he can give the jar to me wakakaka).haha..just a thought.

I'm running out of tv shows and movies to watch.really want to watch enchanted,just dont know when yet.only when mum gets her car.which means soon.very soon,hopefully.

daym,im still suffering from insomnia and nothing has worked for me.i stay up late and wake up late eventhough i am in bed by 11pm,eyes wont close till like 1am.zzzzzz

i miss malaysian food and bak kut teh and curry mee and MAGGI GORENGGGGGG *drools*

krispy kremes is opening on 1st feb soon and we'll be the first few to line up!!hopefuli there wont be a LONG queue.lol

im goin to read a book and try go to sleep...kekeke

2008-01-27T05:25:00.000+08:00

HEATH LEDGER,A LEGENDARY HERO

When I saw the news in the papers that Heath Ledger died,I didn't know what I should be feeling or how I should feel.I was just overwhelmed by sadness that someone so young and talented had to pass away at such a young age.He was only 28 years old and he has a cute little daughter who will grow up without a father.Everyone in the world is mourning the loss of a young,handsome actor who will never be forgotten for his work and films.He's so hot!I still love him.

We will miss you,Heath Ledger.You'll always be remembered.

*candles burning and memorial flowers for you*

2008-01-25T20:16:00.000+08:00

1.What was your dream when you were a small kid?
~to be a beautiful mermaid lol i was a kid back then zzz

2. What is the happiest thing in your whole life?
~getting straight As for my exam

3.What do you wish to have right now?
~to be with my family and friends

4. When was the last time your Horse laugh?
~I don't have any horse and Horses don't laugh :)

5. What did you realize recently?
~you can't trust people easily

6. Which bad habit in you that is most unacceptable
~i'm very defensive and i stand up for myself and sometimes I'm really straightforward,people get offended

7. When you are unhappy, what will you do?
~get out of the house for some fresh air

8. What are you afraid of losing?
~myself

9. Within 5 years, which target is the most realistic one?
~to be in one of the top biomedical companies and be able to use my expertise wisely

10. When you meet someone you like, will you confess or hide your feelings?
~ confess,you've got nothing to hide

11. List out 3 kind of people you hate the most
~ racist people,people who think so highly of themselves it makes me sick,arrogant,selfish bastards(excuse my language)and fake people

12. Define Loneliness
~ lonely without your closest friends and family.

13. Are you satisfied with your life now?
~ errmmm,define satisfied.i think im grateful with what i have right now.

14. When is the most recent time you felt touched?
~ when someone bought flowers for my mum's bday as a surprise gift when i asked them for a huge favour coz i was in melb at that time so it was really touching.

15. Where is the most beautiful place that you've visited?
~ the view at the nubian tea house

16. A song that is playing in your mind recently?
~ I will remember you by Ryan Cabrera

17. If you have a wish come true, what is it?
~ to be able to go to US on exchange.

18. Do you have anything to worried or scared recently?
~ No.

19. If the world is going to end, what will you do?
~ Move to another planet and probably make friends there.lol

20. What is your wild ambition?
~ to be a professional belly dancer

2008-01-23T06:11:00.000+08:00

In a Past Life...

You Were: An Arrogant Belly Dancer.

Where You Lived: Cyprus.

How You Died: The Plague.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

Your Waist to Hip Ratio is 0.8

You are quite curvy. Most clothes look great on you.

How Curvy Are You?

You Are Most Like Eva Longoria

“There's something very sexy about being submissive.”

What Modern Bombshell Are You Most Like?

Your Daddy Is Arnold Schwarzenegger

What You Call Him: Daddy Dearest

Why You Love Him: He takes you to church

Who's Your Daddy?

You'll Find Love Where You Least Expect It

You're the type most likely to find love... surprised?
You shouldn't be! You're a fun, independent woman who is always out and about.
And you're smart to sometimes leave your girlfriends behind and go it alone.
Men love to approach you when you're out by yourself - including Mr. Perfect!

Where Will You Find Your Dream Guy?

Your Seduction Style: The Charmer

You're a master at intimate conversation and verbal enticement.

You seduce with words, by getting people to open up to you.

By establishing this deep connection quickly, people feel under your power.

And then you've got them exactly where you want them!

What Is Your Seduction Style?

You Don't Have a Boyfriend Because You are Too Busy

While a relationship sounds nice, you're strapped for time
Whether you're legitimately busy or just making excuses...
... You don't give men enough of your time.
As nice as "instant love" would be, there's just no such thing.

Why Don't You Have a Boyfriend?

Your Dominant Intelligence is Spatial Intelligence

You've got a good sense of space and how the world around you looks.
You can close your eyes and "see" images. You have innate artistic talent.
An eye for color and shapes, you're also a natural designer.
Since you think in pictures, visual aids and demonstrations help you learn best.

You would make a good navigator, sculptor, visual artist, inventor, architect, interior designer, or engineer.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

You Can Make 69% of Your Crushes Fall in Love With You

Your seduction skills are practically legendary. You know how to close the deal.
Just don't let someone you're really into get the better of you!
As long as you keep up your end of the flirting game, you'll get the prize at the end.

Can You Make Anyone Fall in Love With You?

You are a Great Girlfriend

When it comes to your guy, you're very thoughtful
But you also haven't stopped thinking of yourself
You're the perfect blend of independent and caring
You're a total catch - make sure your guy knows it too!

Are You a Good Girlfriend?

Your Career Type: Investigative

You are precise, scientific, and intellectual.
Your talents lie in understanding and solving math and science problems.

You would make an excellent:

Architect - Biologist - Chemist
Dentist - Electrical Technician - Mathematician
Medical Technician - Meteorologist - Pharmacist
Physician - Surveyor - Veterinarian

The worst career options for your are enterprising careers, like lawyer or real estate agent.

What's Your Ideal Career?

What People Think of Your Mouth

People see you both as mysterious and exotic.
You definitely have cultivated your own unique interests and lifestyle.
Brainy and quick witted, you aren't one for superficial friendships.
But if someone can make you laugh or think, they'll likely be your friend for life.

What Does Your Mouth Say About You?

Your Kissing Grade: A

You are truly an amazing kisser. Your kisses are extraordinarily mind blowing.
Whether you're naturally a good kisser or not, you've taken the time learn how to be the best kisser possible.
Anyone would be lucky to get a kiss from you!

How Do Your Kisses Rate?

Your Fragrance Profile

The best calming fragrance: vanilla
The best fragrance for everyday wear: orange
The best fragrance to boost your sex appeal: lavender
The best fragrance for energy: pine

What's Your Fragrance Profile?

You've Changed 24% in 10 Years

Ah, the past! You may not remember it well - because you're still living in it.
While you've changed some, you may want to update your wardrobe, music collection and circle of friends.

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

You Are Upper Class

Class isn't always about money, and you've at least got the brains, manners, and interests of an upper class person.
You don't have a trashy bone in your body, and you don't pretend to be someone you're not.
You're comfortable with your station in life, and class issues don't really bother you.
The finest things in life are within your reach, and you're comfortable enjoying them.

You may end up: A business leader, corporate lawyer, or philanthropist

Other people who share your class: Bill Gates, Oprah, former world leaders like Bill Clinton, and those reclusive billionaires no one ever talks about.

What Class Are You?

You Make a Great First Impression

You can handle almost any social situation with grace, even the tricky ones.
Strangers often find you charming and interesting. You are often remembered fondly.
Even if you're not naturally outgoing, you can make conversation with anyone if you need to.

Whether you were born this way or had to work to get here, you are definitely charismatic.
You're popular and well liked. People definitely look forward to being around you.
Your social connections bring you a full and rich life. You understand how important it is to make a lasting impression.

What Kind of First Impression Do You Make?

Your Superpower Should Be Manipulating Fire

You are intense, internally driven, and passionate.
Your emotions are unpredictable - and they often get the better of you.
Both radiant and terrifying, people are drawn to you.
At your most powerful, you feel like the world belongs to you.

Why you would be a good superhero: You are obsessive enough to give it your all

Your biggest problem as a superhero: Your moodiness would make it difficult to control your powers

What Should Your Superpower Be?

Your Travel Personality Is: The Adventurer

For you, travel is how you learn about the world. And you like to learn the stuff that's not in guidebooks.
You truly have wanderlust. When you're not traveling, you're dreaming about where you'll go next.
And your travels are truly legendary - they leave you with stories you'll be telling for the rest of your life!

What's Your Travel Personality?

You Are 40% Spoiled

You're barely spoiled. You may have some nice things, but you never let them go to your head.
You appreciate each gift you're given - and you don't dwell on what you "deserve" to have.

Are You Spoiled?

You Are Fun Sexy

You're funny, quirky, cute, and sassy.
Guys always have a great time with you, and that alone is sexy.
You've got an upbeat, optimistic spirit that totally shines through.
Any guy would be crazy to turn you down!

What Kind of Sexy Girl Are You?

Your Guy Could Bring You Home

When it comes to meeting the parents, you're cool and calm.
In fact, you're so self assured, you may forget to try to impress them.
Work that famous charm a little more, and your boyfriend's family will be loving you.

Would He Bring You Home to Mom?

Skinny Jeans

You are classy and a bit formal when it comes to your personal style.
Your look is feminine and well put together - and never trashy or too trendy.

What Style of Womens Jeans Are You?

You Should Travel to India

You're a passionate, gusty traveler - and India's gritty urban centers won't scare you away.
Maybe you'll take in the Taj Mahal, eat the best curry of your life, or attend a huge street festival.

What Asian Country Should You Visit?

Guys Like That You're Fun

You're the type of girl guys brag about knowing
That's because you're cool, funny, and laid back
You're smart enough to know how to be one of the guys
But flirty enough to know how to make them all want you

What Do Guys Like About You?

Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible

Fun, funky, and a little bit euro.
You love your summers to be full of style and sun!

What's Your Summer Ride?

You Sometimes Hold a Grudge

You aren't exactly vengeful, but you're not going to forget when someone wrongs you.
And while you'll forgive the small things, you don't hand out too many second chances to people who really screw up.

Do You Hold a Grudge?

You Should Honeymoon in Europe!

You are a traditional romantic at heart...
With a taste for fine wine, museums and beautiful walks.
You and your sweetie should get romantic in a cafe in Paris
Or get a Eurail pass - and see as many cities as possible!

Suggested destinations: Paris, Venice, London, Greece

Where Would Your Dream Guy Take You on Your Honeymoon?

Your Reputation Is: Maneater

You're the kind of girl all the chicks hate...
And guys are both scared of you yet strangely drawn in.

Do You Have A Bad Girl Reputation?

You Are 56% Perfectionist

No one would call you a perfectionist, but you definitely have a side of you that strives to be perfect.
Try to see your mistakes as learning experiences, and don't be so hard on yourself when you screw up!

Are You a Perfectionist?

You're a Romantic Kisser

For you, kissing is all about feeling the romance
You love to kiss under the stars or by the sea
The perfect kiss involves the perfect mood
It's pretty common for kisses to sweep you off your feet

What Kind of Kisser Are You?

You Are 100% Good

You are not only a good person... you are a model citizen and a natural leader.
Whether you know it or not, your high moral standards and good judgment is truly rare.
You don't take ethical short cuts in life. You are able to do what's right - even when it's very difficult.
And while it may seem like no one else is as on track as you are, take heart in knowing that you set a good example for others.

You are also probably: Very sensitive and in tune with the world

Right now you are on track to being: A saint

To be a better person: Gently mentor someone who is taking the wrong path in life

How Good Are You?

You are Totally Realistic

"Romance" means you're about to roll your eyes
Seriously, you can do without the sap or drama
Save it for someone who has nothing really going on in their relationship

For you, love is real - and easily integrated into your life
You don't need candles, flowers, or chocolates to know he's the one
Just some stimulating conversation... and maybe a great smile.

Are You a Romantic or Realistic Girl?

You Are Very Happy Being Single

You're not anti-relationship. You just don't need one to be content.
You find plenty of happiness from your life as it is.
And if you find someone you love, then that's just icing on an already decadent cake!

Are You Happy Being Single?

Your Learning Style: Competent and Cooperative

You have a great head for facts and figures. You can remember and use any fact you've read.

You Should Study:

Dentistry
Education
Environmental Science
Finance
Nursing
Nutrition Science
Medicine
Law

What Should You Study?

You are 73% Pisces

How Pisces Are You?

You Are a Natural Beauty!

You're the kind of beauty that every guy dreams about...
One that looks good in the morning - without a stich of makeup
That's doesn't mean you're a total hippie chic though
You have style, but for you, style is effortless

What Type of Beauty Are You?

Your Personality Is

Guardian (SJ)

You are sensible, down to earth, and goal oriented.
Bottom line, you are good at playing by the rules.

You tend to be dominant - and you are a natural leader.
You are interested in rules and order. Morals are important to you.

A hard worker, you give your all at whatever you do.
You're very serious, and people often tell you to lighten up.

In love, you tend to take things carefully and slowly.

At work, you are suited to almost any career - but you excel in leadership positions.

With others, you tend to be polite and formal.

As far as looks go, you are traditionally attractive. You take good care of yourself.

On weekends, you tend to like to do organized activities. In fact, you often organize them!

The Three Question Personality Test

2008-01-23T05:26:00.000+08:00

living,smelling,dreaming,feeling the scent of qatar

ive another few weeks before i fly home to melbourne still counting down to the day...and im going back a brand new person...yeah staying here really takes lots of patience and strength and i lack that alot sometimes,its nerve wrecking..

i started my silk painting class today,damn i should have done this AGESSSS AGO and now finally,my parents are listening and letting me do something out of my own free will...hey studying hard in melb and coming back to suffer in this place makes u wana cry mannn...this is my reward phewww...im not their little girl anymore,sit around and not making use of my brains..have to make use of those brain cells...art is such a beautiful hobby,have always loved it...back to the painting,it was really fun!!!i enjoyed myself alot among all the middle aged ladies who share their experiences and hobbies.they were so fascinated by biomed eng,it was really cool to share some of my uni experiences too haha...ive convinced my mum to go to the next class...bet she cant resist lol

finally someone's listening,my Father in the Heavens...the answer to my prayers

mum passed her driving test thank God...the whole family is relieved now...

other than that,been chillin and hopefuli goin out with sheen on friday or do something...she may bring me to some disco place if theres a good one...lol

ive been doing lots of colouring and painting and its finally completed...goin to bring it home with me to hang up on my wall in IH...hey ben,you'll be proud of me now *beams* wahaha

been suffering from insomnia since i came here...its been getting really bad.i was supposed to sleep like 3 hours ago but its not happening.and ive an early morning,volunteering at lishan's school for international week.how do u recover from insomnia??have to look up on that..

i actually miss my friends in melbourne especially some of them from my course...at least i'll get to see them again when i get back...

the moment i reach melb,im goin to get a new hairdo...keep it longer and get it highlighted with some colours...haha...its much cheaper in melb than here...might as well lol..

ive to wake up at 8am and im stil too awake to sleep...
theres too much on my mind i guess..

someone changed my mind about guys today and i think it will stay in my head for a long time...i'll be fine sooner or later...and ive learnt a very important lesson in my life.watch the fire or else you'll get burnt.

toodles...updates later...

Butterfly Lady xoxoxoxo

2008-01-20T03:49:00.000+08:00

Signing up for silk painting!I hope i do get to go to their classes...start on tues!!

Lishan's international week - we're malaysians so have to wear malaysian outfits and im volunteering so i hope i get stuff done.decorate the place and mum's going to cook some malaysian food

reading chronicles of narnia(the kid's version)-not to say its not childish,it is but i mean i need to do something to kill time and keep my brain active at the same time(continuously thinking and making sure i do)

1421 by gavin menzies on how the chinese found america earlier than chris columbus - still getting thru that book

down with the flu coz the weather is crazy - reminds me of melbourne weather,constantly changing (hot to cold to hot to cold etc)

the pool looks tempting,its nice to swim and all but its sooooo cold in this weather

sand everywhere - fine sand from the dunes,its so softtttt

im going back to melb in a months time!!!weeeeeeeeeeeee

i dont want to sit around,waste time and be brain dead

u wanna do something,u do it!and make use of the opportunities u have rite now!

i cant sit around and wait for something to happen,i need to pursue what i think is right and what i should be doing!

cant wait to start uni and study again...of coz im grateful im at uni,studying what i wanna study and do what is right...and thats all i need,the support system that keeps me going!

i just need that...my time and space...and the people i love and care around me

2008-01-18T02:27:00.000+08:00

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)

Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I prayed I could break away

[Chorus:]
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
And I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

[Chorus]

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around revolving doors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakaway

I'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway

2008-01-16T20:54:00.000+08:00

BREAKDOWN

no one cares,no one listens and im just a nobody...God hear me out!

whenever i speak,its called a complain

i cant even express my feelings in anyway

coz i dont have the right to

what kind of life is this?

my family dont understand shit about anything

assume im this kind of person who doesnt do anything productive,who just wastes time when I'm waiting for something to happen

like when i got the job,i was the happiest person and i was so excited to begin working..i love working in kitchens especially in IH when the jo and jacky can laugh about the silly things we self helpers do..go crazy,sing,make vassi annoyed,boss around freshers...

no one knows who i am and they assume they do

and my mum claims SHE KNOWS me...bullshit
and the thing that chissed me off is when she said i was feeling sorry for myself...WTF?feeling sorry for myself??why the @#$% would i blardy feel sorry for myself?its not even about feeling sorry for myself!!and call me spoilt but is it always me being confined in my own house as if im a 5 year old child when im gona be f-in 21 years old in 2 months time!tell me i dont understand and im being selfish

if im being rude,its honesty

i know life here isnt easy...im being patient enough to stay at home and take all that crap...its normal,im used to it

and im supposed to pretend that im fine??

my friends are all back home and thats ok??lonely and miserable but who cares?it doesnt matter right...

it hurts,it really hurts that im not allowed to voice out how i feel...i dont feel like going back home...its painful and still no one understands...and they say im the one whose the problem,im the source of the problem,im this,im that..its all my fault..im lousy,im not good enough...i get that every day of my life...

i really i started uni a long time ago just so i dont have to deal with all this shit...im here coz my dad and no one else...
ive no outlet,no one to turn to except God who can hear my cries and prayers

nothing i say matters anymore...and when i cry,im crying out for someone to hear me out but it doesnt reach anyone anymore

2008-01-04T22:37:00.000+08:00

UPDATES ON THE EGYPT TRIP

PLEASE REFER TO http://caterpillarlishan.blogspot.com

too malas to update

happy reading! and happy new year!

2007-12-21T03:04:00.001+08:00

I can't remember when was the last time I had nice warm bath in the bathtub.....lavender and bubblesssss....so refreshing and relaxing!!!man i wish i could do this any day,every day!!

neway,going to egypt 2moro!!have to wake up at 4am in the morning~!!!leaving the house at 5am!!!lol...craziness...flight is at 7.30am and it takes us 4 hours to get to cairo!!im so excited!!!weeeeeee....cant wait!!!

lol..i got more pics from the national day of the republic of kazakhstan...wil update as soon as i get back from egypt...that wil around new year's eve!!!

2007-12-19T03:39:00.000+08:00

Yippeeeeeeeeeeee

Xmas is coming soon and we're going to celebrate xmas in egypto!!!magnifique~!!i cant wait!!!so excited weeeeeeeeeee.....been xmas shopping for daddy and we made him open his xmas prezies today!!!he was happy!!hehe its so nice to see that smile on daddy's face...we bought him like cotton white shirts(for nightwear),undies(zzz u didnt need to know that),a nice linen shirt(for casualwear)and a polo parfum eau de toilette!!!weeeeeee daddy love it!!kekeke...

2moro we go hang out with su mei,my new 18 year old friend...seems amazing isnt it...maybe coz i havent met anyone around my age group to hang out with "yet"...yes,YET...young little kiddies hanging around in lishan's school reminds me of my crazy times back in high school with alvin,lava,chanduru,and da gang...man,miss them arghhhhh...

i miss my inaians.....may,mich,sha,min min,hsiao hsien...man,seems forever before i go back to KL...im making sure that im going back next june!!!I AM GOING TO MAKE SURE I WILL GO BACK!!hehe...but where am i going to stay?lol...

weather here is getting colder...it should be but i think theres quite a sudden climate change...its weird...duno what to make of it but yeah...

still getting used to people here and the stares people give you...not funny...like those murderous looks as if they're going to eat you alive if you don't follow their culture...hmm...dee daa daa dee daa daa...*skips around*

there have been a decrease in the hotness of qatar's population.eventhough there is 70% more men than women,there should be at least hot ones to look at right.bosan wei.i mean now i can say that KL has better taste in men than here.i would even appreciate looking at ah bengs or transvestites seriously.at least i know im at the right place.eyh,im straight lol.

yesterday we went to watch the hitman.damn it was good..i think it was not bad considering ive never heard of the main actor before and he was good.he looked quite ok la...but i wished wentworth miller played that role.but neway,the censorship board here!!!arghhhhhhh potong the steamy scenes...didnt even get to kissing already potong the scene wth!!damn potong rite!!i was like arghhhhh....damn zzzzzz...i need to get the ciplak dvd for the original version...lol..

neway im goin to go watch some tv...toodles...

2007-12-15T21:56:00.000+08:00

National Day of the Republic of Kazakhstan

Thursday night - Went to Ritz Carlton Hotel to celebrate the national day of kazakhstan.we were invited by lishan's fren whose the ambassador's daughter.had lots of good food and nice ppl.It was good.haha.

Friday night - family was invited to dr. sivam's house and we met with a few ppl around our age group.it was nice to see that ppl around my age group do exist!thank God!

2007-12-12T01:16:00.001+08:00

stalkers

Today has been pretty freaky.People stare at you funnily just by the way you dress as though they have never seen the way people dress before.It's weird how we have to adapt with such behaviours.Men act so desperate as if they've never seen women before(i can't blame them since the population is only 800k and there is 70% more men than women)...sadly,women are mostly wrapped up and unable to reveal any part of their body except their eyes.It seems that it has become a norm to be seen in "abayas".So to us,where everythin is different and we do not attempt to practise their culture,people always think we're philipinos(putting us in second class as workers)but we always convince them that we're malaysians and we don't work in their country.I guess this needs getting used to.

Let me explain a few very interesting situations.

1. Strangers you meet for the first time will invite you to their house for tea/meals/etc just out of courtesy or decency.
2. Men honked when they see women on streets (just coz they dont see women that often)but i think it's pretty rude
3. Men randomly give you their numbers hoping you will call them back
For example: Someone working at the departmental store was showing me a few dresses,asked for our number just so he can tell us about the sale but instead want more malaysian contacts so we can be his tour guide in malaysia if that makes any sense(weirdo)
4. Men offer to give you a ride in their car(making a U-turn and stopping in front of you) just so they can get to know you better or would like to try at least.
5. Women stare at other women who aren't dressed more "decently"
6. Drivers here are insane,they cut lanes without putting signal and not only do they drive massive cars,they intimidate others and its scarier than in malaysia.

Maybe these are just the very few events that has been happening here but lol,so far havent got into any trouble which is good...i dun think ppl here are as bad and indecent to do anything to us...further updates later:)

2007-12-10T00:18:00.001+08:00

You,
Do you remember me
Like I remember you?
Do you spend you life
Going back in your mind
To that time?

‘Cause I,
I walk the streets alone
I hate being on my own,
And everyone can see that
I really fell
And I’m going through hell
Thinking ‘bout you with somebody else

Somebody wants you
Somebody needs you
Somebody dreams about you
Every single night
Somebody can’t breathe
Without you, it’s lonely
Somebody hopes that one day you will see
That somebody’s me
That somebody’s me
Yeah

How,
How did we go wrong?
It was so good
And now it’s gone,
And I pray at night
That our paths soon will cross,
That what we had isn’t lost
‘Cause you’re always right here
In my thoughts

Somebody wants you
Somebody needs you
Somebody dreams about you
Every single night
Somebody can’t breathe
Without you, it’s lonely
Somebody hopes that someday you will see
That somebody’s me
Oh, yeah

You will always be in my life,
Even if I’m not in your life,
‘Cause you’re in my memory

You,
When you remember me,
And before you set me free,
Oh, listen please.

Somebody wants you
Somebody needs you
Somebody dreams about you
Every single night
Somebody can’t breathe
Without you, it’s lonely
Somebody hopes that someday you will see
That somebody’s me
(ha ha ha ha)
That somebody’s me
(ha ha ha ha)
That somebody’s me
(ha ha ha ha)
That somebody’s me
(ha ha ha ha)
Oh, yeah.

2007-12-10T00:14:00.000+08:00

miss my friends..i dedicate this song so the friends who have been there through every step of the way...may,min,sha,mich who have been there thru my primary skewl life...thank you,i miss u guys so much...my high skewl frenz,alvin,lava,chanduru,sasi,eddie,ikhsan,becky,steph...my taylors friends...thank you...im homesick and i miss u guys...lol...

Ryan Cabrera - I WILL REMEMBER YOU

eight years later
Time goes by fast
Got my memories
And they will last
I try to keep it simple cause I hate goodbyes
I try to keep it simple by telling myself that

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I could say
But words get in the way so
We're not together
I will remember you
I will remember you

We're a picture in my mind
And when I wanna find you
I just close my eyes
You'll never be that far from me
So don't say goodbye cause
You'll never be that far from me
I'm telling myself that

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I could say
But words get in the way so
We're not together
I will remember you

You were there when I needed a friend
Thank you, thank you
I never told you how much that meant
God thank you, thank you
I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I could say
But words get in the way so
I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I could say
But words get in the way so
We're not together
I will remember
We're not together
I will remember you
I will remember you

2007-12-05T18:31:00.000+08:00

Doha...what can i say about doha?

I was abit worried when i first came out from the airport.There were so many indians and hardly any arabs...it was pretty freaky and they were all staring at me as if i was some alien.but weather was pretty ok,thank God not freaking 50 degrees celcius!!!so far its ok la...tolerable...no alcohol,no pork...everywhere sand...but its pretty modern la if u compare to other countries...zzzz...havent really explored much yet...just decided to sign up for dance classes...latin,groove and belly dancing...so im occupying myself with things to do...probably do silk painting as well...its quite boring here especially when im friendless and have to mix with mum's friends...she drags me to her women lunches and im stuck there...duno what to say...they're all like u know middle aged to late 50's...what is a poor young girl like me supposed to do?i'd probably get back to my reading habit,borrow some books...indulge in some important things to do...haha...still suffering from jetlag coz of the time difference...getting better but feel so tired in the afternoons...and cant really sleep at night...so yeah...well then,my sis is having her piano performance tonight so hav to go and get ready...ta!further updates later...

P.S. THANK YOU MIN MIN,CHRIS,JONATHAN AND IAN FOR ACCOMPANYING ME IN THE AIRPORT!!!I WAS JUST IN TIME FOR MY FLIGHT!!!COULD HAVE MISSED IT MAN!OMG...THANK GOD!AND I GOT MY BAGGAGE PHEW...MISS U ALL!!!SEE U ON 18 FEB HAHA HUGSSSSS

2007-11-29T08:42:00.000+08:00

goin home in 3 days time...sigh...

its for my dad so i shouldnt be sad...

ive been packing my stuff and im stil packing...so much stuf to pack...ive got to clean up my room...zzzzzz goin to egypt during the hols so thats good...

transitting in singapore so i hope to see my frenz there...haha..

miss KL badly...lol...

2007-11-24T16:45:00.000+08:00

EXAMS IS OFFICIALLY OVER!!!WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

CELEBRATED WITH END OF THE YEAR UNI PARTY AT ROYAL MELB HOTEL CLUB,IT WAS AWESOME!IT WAS COZ OF THE CROWD ALL IH-ERS TOOK OVER THE CENTER STAGE HAHA...

Last night,went to daniel's party...the BME's...it was pretty kewl...played table tennis...haha...dan has like this 2 huge dogs...omg so huge!bigger than saint bernard's like polar bears like that...haha...damn big!so nice and fluffy...so cute and huggable...

ive to start packing on monday...collect boxes on sunday...sigh...

so sad...cant believe im going to doha...sux...duno what to do there...like oven only over there...2 shopping centres in the whole city...no pork,no nothing there,arghhhhh...damn boring...hahahaha

neway im goin to chill for abit and hunt for heroes episode9...mishhhh everyone...zzzzz esp everyone back home...

2007-11-19T17:45:00.000+08:00

im still thinkin about IBS n i know i shudnt...its over,its done!could hav done better...why am i fretting??sigh...

america's next top model is on...and this is only season 6...

want to watch heroes episode 9 omg its so damn good!!!!im addicted to heroes now...

cant wait to finish...

2007-11-19T17:39:00.000+08:00

IBS disappointed me...sigh...i really hope i can get at least a H2B/H3 borderline...arghhhhh i studied like hell for this damn paper...just hope i get this right...there were sum things i knew but i didnt read enough about assuming that nah,they wont ask this...skip skip...then it comes out and im left blank and this is when ive to put my bullshit skills to use...well kinda combination between actual facts and bullshit...wonder how that turned out to be...anyway ive one more paper and im desperately waiting to finish asap...in a way its good to hav 2 days to study for it...ive done abit of reading on ying's and dragan's part but they're pretty tough...ive appointment with ying tomorrow bout her part...its pretty confusing...neway,today is my off day coz i havent been sleeping enough and im just too tired to do anythin at the moment...having a bad bad headache from all that IBS...i really hope we dun hav to do that again seriously...bio is such a *bleep*...time to go and chill out...2moro is the day studying becomes slavery...last paper!!!!arghhhh cant wait!!!

p.s. today was funny...heenal,hannah and I were wearing same blue tops and white pants/skirt...and ppl were looking at us funny...haha...

2007-11-09T06:36:00.000+08:00

exam fever...did my first 2 papers....which was alrite...i really hope i'll get a borderline H2A/H1 for eng B...i did all 11 questions out of 12...hopefully can get it...im not too sure bout IBS coz i think i screwed up my experiment...multiple choice questions was alrite despite the fact i didnt know CAL was coming out...damn it...but they were kinda similar to the past year papers...sigh...now have2start studying for paper 2 and bsm...

2007-10-14T08:55:00.000+08:00

weeeeeee I AM GOING TO LINKIN PARK CONCERT TONIGHT!!!!!!

ITS TIME TO GET HYPED!!!I LOVE LINKIN PARK!!!

OK,BEFORE THEN,GOT WORK2DO BUT WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IM SO EXCITED!!!
CHRIS CONNELL FROM AUDIOSLAVE IS DOING THE OPENING ACT!!YEAY BEBEH!!

any updates?I am feeling productive today!!hav2do my eng B assignment and respiration post prac if i know how....FOURIER SERIES!!!ARGHHHHHHHH LAPLACE TRANSFORMS!!!

ZZZZZZZZZZ overdose of laplace and fourier can kill u...

gues what??i will get this right!!!

i can do this!!!

i have to keep telling myself that...lol

exam timetable:

Engineering Analysis B - 7 Nov
Integrated Biomed Science (paper 1)- 8 nov
Integrated Biomed Science (paper 2)- 19 nov
Bioengineering Systems Modelling 2 - 22 nov

I need to do this!!!at least 2 H2A and 1H3/P(for IBS) lol...

i need to get the results i got last sem...the equivalent!!need this so badly!!!have to study hard now....further updates later....

2007-10-13T20:57:00.001+08:00

ok,its officially 3 weeks before my first exam,Eng B and IBS is the day after...wth..

feeling stressed...why?i feel i havent been doing enough work and its only a few weeks away to my finals...i need to make the grade to go to US on exchange...its my dream...and i need to get it!!!i want to go to US,ive been dreaming about since last year...UC davis!!!ive been researching and researching...

stil have to get a certified copy of my passport,my exchange essay i duno what2write,my resume,and the academic reference...i need to get my subject plan worked out and i know exactly what to do..ive 2 appointments next week with lisa hayes and hiroko miyano regarding my exchange subjects and my visa etc...i need to make it!!!!i want this so badly!!my dream to US!

good news!!!ive got upgraded in BSM 1 from last sem...they remarked my paper and apparently they missed out 1 ques which was worth 10 marks so i got upgraded from H2B TO H2A!!!!sooooo happpyyyyyyyy!!!weeeeeeeee...so i have to do as well as i did last sem in order to get this!!!i really hope i do!!!

mamak food.......
me want mamak fooooood...

ok back to work toodles

2007-10-12T19:34:00.000+08:00

busy busy week...so i'll just update about what i did after the wilson's prom trip...

church camp at philip island,koala park resort the week after from 27th-29th sept...it was damn good!!!awesome!!yeah,and i was procrastinating when i was there...I HAD 4 ASSIGNMENTS/LAB REPORT ETC DUE THE WEEK AFTER HOLS!ARGHHH...and yes,the IBS DRAFT almost killed me...spent the whole nite doing the draft omg...zzzzz...had 3 things due the week after....its insane...omg why did i take biomed eng?they think we're like robots wan ka...2 more weeks before end of sem and im already feeling the stress...with all this stuff,how can u possible study for ur final exams??in the meantime,i have to look for accomodation for next year as well as work out my exchange subjects for next year and also book my flight ticket.

flight ticket booked and is set to leave for doha on 1st dec but transitting in sg on 1st dec night...arrive doha at 6.10am 2nd dec...zzzzz....so thats done...stil got my exchange thing to do...have to get academic reference,type an exchange essay,get subject approval...have to write a resume,have to get the photocopy of passport verified...not sure bout american visa...so much2do...accomodation next year i oso duno how...hmm...i feel bad coz if i go on exchange i'll be leaving jia pei behind and i dont want to stay in IH for 6 months...its too much...cant tahan ady...sunmmore so expensive and its a waste of money if the food sux...zzzzz

neway,valedicts was last nite...enjoyyyyy....it was so kewl!!weeeeeee....bitter sweet memories...its the last formal dinner of the year and it was fun...tho i had lab report due the next day...i wont be in college to experience this again haha...did i say we went to puggs?haha...ppl were dancing and having fun lol...but i felt bad coz i was supposed to DO WORK AT HOME...i havent been out for ages tho since the hols ended hehe...but stil...it was just one night...heenal cooked butter chicken and paneer ini my apartment today...and we had roti chanai tooo!!!!weeeeee...was sooooo good...since IH was serving fish 2nite and i cant hav any of that unless i want to have another allergic reaction lol...it was sooo good we had rice and roti chanai hehe...so good i miss mamak food...hmm...dreading the day im going to doha...zzzzzzz...music night is coming up and halloween party oso...and christmas dinner.....omg,when wil this ever end....goin back2do some work....

i miss everyone!!!!mummy,daddy,shan shan

kimminyen...

sri inai buddies...may,mich,sha,my bebehs...love u allllll

no im not emo-ing...sob sob

wangsa maju mates - miss lavy baby

alvin,edmund,sasi,chanduru...

S9...

ben,jonathan,ian,becky...

i wana go home......

2007-09-25T20:06:00.000+08:00

2007-09-16T16:11:00.000+08:00

phantom of the opera was and is SENSATIONAL.omg!!!its such a good theatre!!!amazingly good...better than the movie!!wayyyyy better!!!it was fabulous!!!i love it!!!the songs are stuck in my head!!!weeeeeeeeeeee,i enjoyed myself!!it was worth every penny,every dollar!!!

ICSS ball....hmm....it was alright...not fantastic but it was ok la...joe flizzow from too phat was performing and he was pretty kewl..i gues i enjoyed the company and my frenz from taylors...afterparty was at lavish which was pretty good...we joined the rest of the taylorians...haha..had tuns of fun...i didnt get too drunk...after 3 glasses of wine,1 glass of beer,3 shots,i was fine!!!was tipsy during the cruise but after that,i could walk straight!!!lol...sobered up at the afterparty yoohoooooooo...danced like a mad person...dats what the ball is bout hehe...hmm...time for dinner now....ttyl

2007-09-05T12:29:00.000+08:00

All American Kid

Popular but not plastic. Athletic but not a jock. Smart but not a brain.

You were well rounded and well liked in high school.

Who Were You In High School?

You Are Right Brained In Love

Bit of a drama queen
Peacemaker, first to end a fight
Good at thinking up creative dates
Tend to fall in love and get hurt easily
Going with your gut instead of your head
Empathetic and caring, sometimes to a fault
Good at recognizing patterns in relationships
Been in love many times, perhaps too many to count
Wildly passionate and intense when falling in love
Spontaneous with relationships, going with the flow
Overly visual - can play back past dates like movies in your mind
Roses, love poems, and stuffed animals are a good start to winning your heart

Are You a Right Brained or Left Brained Woman in Love?

Your Famous Movie Kiss is from Romeo + Juliet

"Has my heart loved 'till now? Forswear it, sight! For I never saw a true beauty 'till this night."

What Famous Movie Kiss Are You?

Your Celebrity Sisters Are Mary-Kate and Ashley

Funky, eccentric, and offbeat
You're not a good girl or a bad girl, just a weird girl

Who Are Your Celebrity Sisters?

You Were Pretty Average This Year

You Were 45% Naughty, 55% Nice

You tried to be a good girl this year...
But as you know, being good isn't that fun!
If you're extra sweet, you may have enough time to get on that nice list.

Were You a Naughty Girl or Nice Girl this Year?

Guys Think You're Easy to Be With... But Not Easy

You're definitely a flirt - and a good one.
But you also know that you shouldn't make a move on any cute guy who passes by.
You save your seductive moves for someone who already knows the real you.
That way, your sex appeal is just part of the whole package.

Are You An Easy Girl?

Your Kissing Technique Is: Perfect

Your kissing technique is amazing - and you know it.
You have the confidence to make the first move.
And you always seem to know what kissing style is going to work best.
Sometimes you're passionate, sometimes you're a tease. And you're always amazing!

Are You a Good Kisser?

You Are an Okay Student

You know how to get by school, but your heart isn't always in it.
Motivation is a problem for you. Maybe you need to study something more exciting!

Are You a Good Student?

You Are a Good Friend Because You're Loyal

You stick with your friends no matter what, even if you feel like they're doing the wrong thing.
You believe in letting people figure out their own path in life. It's not your place to interfere.

And part of your loyalty means that you'll do a lot for your friends. You definitely go the extra mile.
You'll even do great things for friends without them asking. After all, that's what friendship is all about.

You are truly a friend for life. And you have friends you've known since you were a kid.
Your friends can count on you to do a favor, remember a birthday, or just be there to listen.

Your friends need you most when: They can't turn to anyone else

You really can't be friends with: Fickle people who change friends quickly

Your friendship quote: "Friendship doubles your joys, and divides your sorrows."

What Makes You a Good Friend?

2007-09-03T12:41:00.000+08:00

IBS can kiss my ass....

i hate bio
i hate bio
i hate bio
and i'll say that again
i would love it more if it wasnt bio
eng B next
eng B
eng B

PMS today...
arghhhh

sleep la better

2007-09-03T12:26:00.000+08:00

For Guys:
1. What do you look at when you see a girl? The boobs or the butt or…?
guys will be guys.obviously,they'll look anywhere their eyes take them

2. How do you feel about plus size women? Would you date her?
lol,i wouldnt know this

3. Choose between your mom or your girlfriend.
mummy's boys definitely choose their mums first right..lol

4. Your place or mine tonight?
this is for guys to answer lol...

5. There is a hot gal at the party? How would you approach her? Would you do it if you are already attached?
lol i duno this one...

6. Where or what would you do with your hot date if you are on a budget?
go arcade or stroll around the park...zzzzz

7. She has a stain on her shirt at her chest area. Would you tell her?
guys would normally say, "let me get that for you".

8. She spends more time with her gay best fren that hang out wit you. Would you be jealous?
guys shouldn't be worried at all..i mean come on,he's gay and he doesnt have the hots for girls...

For Gals:
1.What turns you on? Guys in boxers or guys in brief or nothing at all or…?
lol...no idea...this question is off my league

2.Would you buy flowers 4 a guy as a present?
yeah,why not?

3.If your bf doesnt have a car, would you u drive him around?
yeah,if i remember how to...lol

4.Hot guy in a party, would you approach him? If yes, how?
hmm...hard question...maybe,let the eyes do the talking lol...

5.Is size really that important?
lol...not sure about that...

6.He is the guy of your dreams. Would you play hard to get?
yeah,for sure...if he really is the guy of my dreams...

7.He is an hour late for your date. Would you still go out with him on that date or have a girls night out?
GIRLS NIGHT OUT!

8.You burped when you are kissing. How would you handle this situation?
laugh and joke about it...and say sorry...lol

2007-08-29T14:49:00.001+08:00

do you believe in fate?

i think things happen for a reason so we are taught a lesson.Sometimes we don't realise we've made mistakes till we find out by ourselves.

its true how ppl say that there's a reason for things that happen and it's all in God's will.what i don't understand is how do we know if it is or isn't?

i think it's actually how you would make a difference in someone's life and you yourself will learn something from it.

at least i know what i'm supposed to do.

you can't believe everything you hear.there are some things that can't be trusted.actually,men can't be trusted.why?coz they do everythin sweet and try to woo you and the next moment,once they've got u,they treat u like nothing and stop appreciating.thats why i tell my mother im not getting married.i'd rather keep dogs.

no offense...

i mean not all ppl are like that...but im just looking it at another person's view.u know what im talking bout.bad experiences.wouldn't want to think bout it actually.

this is gonna be a crazy week.yes,crazyyyyyy week!lol...my ass hurts from sitting too much...

monday - ibs test (39 lectures ,blardy hell!)
tues- eng B assignment
wed - eng B test
thurs - ibs lab report
friday - BSM test(im so ****-ed)

ok well...stress is building up but chocolate is the cure to everythin...fitness first is a pain in the arse...why?coz they said i cant quit!wtf?i hav to cancel my membership,i havent been doing anythin in the gym and they're goin2charge me for not going to the gym??what kind of gym is that?full of zzzzzzzz...

time to nap...sleeeepppppyyyyyy

2007-08-27T22:44:00.000+08:00

omg,i forgot to update...sri inaians in melb...went down to clayton to meet swee hoe, wei yen and the gang...managed to catch up with michelle also...weng kin couldnt make it...so anyway...here are some pics...haha...and trust me,this was agesssss agoooooo.......wahahaha..

2007-08-27T22:33:00.000+08:00

camwhoring....my apartment darlings!!mwahhhhhh

2007-08-23T13:18:00.000+08:00

Tuesday - Eng B assignment

Wednesday - BSM assignment (arghhhhhh,wrong wrong,all wrong!!)

Thursday - online submission(e learning), pre prac, lab report!!!

insane week!!and with all the other shit that came together with it was a bomb!!cant believe 2 things can happen twice with 2 different ppl and yet i can do nothing bout it.feel shit.but i have no regrets.its not my time.

other than that, prac today was pretty disgusting.fluid balance.we were all assigned to different groups and i was the water load.so all of us have to pee every half an hour till the 100th minute.and I was in charge of measuring my group members' PEE!believe it or not,it was reali gross at first but kinda got used to it after a while.its funny how we can see what alcohol does to your body.the 6th subject had to drink 1ml of alcohol per kg of body weight.he had the most pee.lol.anyway,its been interesting so far.

have to start studying for mid sem tests.havent done anythin so far.sigh.ive kinda switched off my studying brain for the past one month.dont know why.i need some sleep...havent been able to sleep the past week.too much going on...just add to my confusion.

cant wait for the september break.

whats lined up for me for the next few weeks:

- IH musical
- empress dowager and I chinese theatre
- photography gallery at state library
- skiing(if possible)
- phantom of the opera
- church camp at philip island with all the cute penguins
- linkin park concert

finally,i'm doing some thing interesting.some thing i like.i found a place near sidney myer asia centre which has the most beautiful scenery.its a place where i should draw and pin it up.undescribable.just beautiful.very relaxing too.near the fountain.haha.time to zzzzzzzz

2007-08-14T18:41:00.000+08:00

it's been yet another crazy week filled with work and assignments.the usual.and i've been thinking bout last friday still lol...im missin home...i have so much to say but i think i'll keep th thoughts to myself...mum and lishan leaving for doha this thurs for good and i cant believe how fast time flies...and im a quarter thru uni already...sigh...im happy at the moment with good company around me and everythin is good...well then...i should get back to work...

2007-08-11T21:39:00.000+08:00

Where did you go? by Ashley Parker Angel(its a good song =p)

There's an empty room full of memories,
And everywhere I look, it's where we used to be.
It's like a photograph,
A moment froze in time,
I'm staring at your face, even when I close my eyes.

Oh oh, where'd you go?
I thought you'd never leave,
Oh oh, should have known,
How much you mean to me.
Oh oh, where you are is where I wanna be,
So, it's a shame that you'll never really know.

I wish I could go back,
And be with you again.
'Cos there's so many things I should have said,
When I had you listening.
As close as we were then, as far as we are now,
As much as this won't change a thing,
You've got me calling out...

Oh oh, where'd you go?
I thought you'd never leave,
Oh oh, should have known,
How much you mean to me.
Oh oh, where you are is where I wanna be,
So, it's a shame that you'll never really know.

Now was it ever meant to last?
The candles burned from yesterday,
The past is over, gone ahead
And watch the glow just fade away.
I can't run to catch my breath,
I can't hide to see what's left,
The plans, the hopes, the dreams, the tears,
All disappeared...

Oh oh, where'd you go?
I thought you'd never leave,
Oh oh, should have known,
How much you mean to me.
Oh oh, where you are is where I wanna be,
So, it's a shame that you'll never really know.
Oh oh, where'd you go?
I thought you'd never leave,
Oh oh, should have known,
How much you mean to me.
Oh oh, where you are is where I wanna be,
So, it's a shame that you'll never really know.

So, it's a shame that you'll never really know...
It's a shame that I never really showed.

2007-08-11T21:19:00.000+08:00

table tennis finals!!!

we won!!!need we say more???kicked ass against medley hall!!!we celebrated with alcohol...was all good!!!everythin went perfectly fine and the next day,ive been procrastinating...will hav to do work and study!!!

last night was much needed...

missing home still....

when are we moving to doha??

soon soon soon...2moro??

hmm.....im still wondering...

i want to be home...

and i want to be with dad...

why am i so far away???

ive been listening to ashley parker angel's songs...soothing...

don't rush into love because you may end up getting hurt...

give to those who deserve it the most...

it's rewarding when you make a difference in a person's life...

not now,not when you're not ready...not when you haven't learn how to give....

not when you haven't gotten over the past

commitment and trust is important...

it's too soon...it's not the time...it's not my time...

la la la la la la la la

along the way, it's where im supposed to be
along the way, is there a space in between?
have you found your destiny?
time is all you need...
along the way...

i wish i was there to heal your pain
i wish i was there to be your support
and be there to make you smile
to hear your laughter
it won't be too long...
i'll be there soon...
all you need is to trust and believe in me
coz i will always be daddy's little girl

in God's love,im happy
to embrace the truth
to be filled in his presence
to share his love with others
to know that im cared for
to feel that i will be safe...

2007-08-08T16:38:00.000+08:00

firstly,i did not say ive moved on...and isnt that what you're doing to me now?just grow up seriously...and i did not say i didnt appreciate what u have done for me....did i say any of that?u misinterpreted everythin ive said...and turning it against urself...thats why u'll never understand anything...and all i said is i wanted your friendship...is that too much to ask for?if we're going to keep on ignoring each other and stop talking,i suggest and ive said it before there's no point of a frenship...i dont need all this alienation...whatever it is,it doesnt matter to u...our frenship means nothing to u...and so,what else can i do?ive apologized to u a hundred times...know what?forget it...just forget bout this frenship and forget bout everythin that we went thru together...i dont need you as a friend if this is how its going to be...take care and good luck with your life...thanks for the times we spent and all that u've done for me...

no title

2007-08-07T18:52:00.000+08:00

sigh...been insanely busy with IH activities as well as uni work,table tennis tournaments and life by itself...

table tennis semi finals will start tomorrow.gosh,we're playing trinity colllege.the one with the irritating jesters that you wouldnt mind having a shooting spree!got practice soon and yes,work...uni work...assignments,e learning,the usual...

and yes life on its own...sigh where do i start?truth is so many things have been happening its pretty hard to keep track of whats going on around me...firstly,i would say...i miss this friend who used to be my friend but isn't anymore or i just don't know what's going on...rejection...big word...friendship...can u relate them?its like this...u have this wonderful friendship with this amazing person and that person expects more than a friendship from you but something is holding you back and you can't get through with it...so there comes rejection(not because you want to but you just can't for many reasons)...then,this person stays away from you,forgets all the good memoris both of you had...throws away your friendship and treats you like an alien who has no feelings,no memories,no thoughts whatsoever...after all the things u have done for that friend such as lending your home,being the tourist guide and having a blast,a good time...all gone,forgotten just because the person wanted more than just a friendship...just because both have different needs...just because the person doesn't understand you better...how good is that?the truth is it doesn't matter...there are many more friendships that will blossom...many more opportunities out there...so i guess all we can do is just deal with it and move on with life...

singapore trip- happy memories in KL and singapore

2007-07-20T13:27:00.000+08:00

Hey guys,
Thank you all heaps for making the best of my holidays and spending heaps and heaps of time with me before i left.It's been the best hol ever and i've had an awesome time here thanks to u.Crazy shit happens but i guess we just have to make the best out of everythin we do.I have no regrets leaving this place although i do regret stupid things i have done which is abit idiotic and silly of me.Anyway,im going to freaking miss all of you like mad!It would be a lie if i said i'll forget bout everythin that happened here and act as if nothing has happened.Truly,im going to miss everythin bout u guys and i just want to thank you for being there for me.No matter what happens,regardless of all the silly things ive done(so sorry),our friendship will be treasured and cherished.I'll never forget all the time spent with all of you and you guys have really made me happy,the happiest i have ever been.Shit,im making such a long grandma speech.Im just going to miss u all ya?Im leaving my house in 2 hours time and i cant let this emo-ness get to me.sigh.love you all heaps!hugs and kisses,you guys will never be forgotten.thanks for everything!

2 more weeks in KL

2007-07-07T10:56:00.000+08:00

My house is still under renovation and things are just so hectic here.I've been going out almost every 2 days to spend time with my friends.I'm going to singapore next week and gonna meet up with a few friends.I can't believe this holiday is ending.It's too soon!!Migrating to a new country is unimaginable.At the end of the year,i'll be going to doha and I won't be coming back to KL for a very very long time.

Yesterday,my mum's bag got snatched and we were all in so much shock!3 men from a car came up and took her bag!she was holding on to it and they drove off dragging her on the road!I was just so angry!!!And my mum had to wait 2-3 freaking hours to make a report!!!The first thing the inspector asked was "kenapa pakai seksi sangat?" wtf man!!!and my mum was wearing decent clothes...the next thing he said was "kamu mesti kaya punyer kan"...WHAT THE HELL HAS THAT ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE SNATCH THEFT????fucking shit!i was just so damn angry!!!he was criticising my mum and making it seem like it was her fault!!!wtf!ive turned against this country and the ppl in it!u call this country safe and peaceful???in a way,its a blessing we're moving away for good!im going to miss all my friends and all...sigh....

back to reality

2007-07-03T15:59:00.000+08:00

I've been having an awesome time with my high skewl mates and just catching up and all...its been a hectic week and we're renovating the house now...it just hit me how fast time flies and how many more weeks im going to be here before we move to doha in qatar!!!packing up all of our stuff....going through all photo albums and recalling old memories lol...its so fast!!!family will be renting out the house around end of july...mum and lishan will fly off to doha while i fly off to melb around 20th july...3 more weeks in KL...

having the time of my life with my frenzzzzz

2007-06-30T08:56:00.000+08:00

bored

2007-06-26T15:11:00.000+08:00

You Are a Good Friend Because You're Fun

You are energetic, amusing, and always up for a good time.
Optimistic and genuinely happy, you help people see the sunny side of life.

And you're always up for a party... no matter how big or small.
You're usually the first one to celebrate a friend's success.

Anyone who's interesting or fun is welcome in you circle of friends.
You're not the type of person to exclude or make fun of someone who's a little different.

Your friends need you most when: They're down or depressed

You really can't be friends with: Anyone who's stuck up or chronically unhappy

Your friendship quote: "It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."

What Makes You a Good Friend?

You Are Lara Croft

"Everything lost is meant to be found."

What Superheroine Are You?

Your Life is 68% Perfect

Your life is pretty darn perfect. You don't have much to complain about.
Of course, your life is occasionally less than perfect. But you're usually too happy to notice.

How Perfect is Your Life?

You Are Medium Maintenance

You aren't as hard to deal with as some girls
But you aren't the most laid back chick either
You're easy to deal with 90% of the time, but watch out for that 10%!
If the guy you are with has good intentions, then calm down a little
But if he's really screwing up, don't waste your breath - move on :-)

Are You A High Maintenance Woman?

You are a 1960s Diva

Bold dresses, funky boots, bright patterns.
You have an eye for fashion - and make trends timeless!

What Decade Diva Are You?

Your Celebrity Style Twin is Mischa Barton

Funky, bohemian, and girly.

Who's Your Celebrity Style Sister?

You Are 70% Extrovert, 30% Introvert

You are quite outgoing
You are a social connector - you know a ton of people
While you aren't a wild extrovert, you are a great talker
A fantastic storyteller, you keep everyone laughing

Are You An Extrovert or An Introvert?

my latest craze!

2007-06-25T11:33:00.001+08:00

PETER PETRELLI. HOT HOT HOT! ORGASMIC, FANTASTIC, ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS, HUNKY! HE'S MINE MINE MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

home!!!!

2007-06-25T10:29:00.000+08:00

Yesterday,I spent the whole day in KLCC with lishan.watched shrek 3 and bought a new pair of shoes!happyyyyy!then went to visit ai ai jie jie and my little nephew adrian!haha...at night,met up with alvin,lava,chanduru and sasi!i was damn excited and absolutely thrilled...we talked bout lives and experiences...we had to catch up on the good times we had!so fun!then went to mamak and had maggi goreng!!!!and shisha!!!lol...funny la...all these lame jokes...neway.....its was so much fun and i had damn lots of fun...will never trade these frens for anything else in this world!happppyyyyyyyy going to shop more today but hav2unpack my luggage!tt

for shits and giggles

2007-06-22T08:17:00.000+08:00

Your Love Type: INFJ

The Protector

In love, you strive to have the perfect relationship.
For you, sex is nearly a spiritual experience, a bonding of souls.

Overall, you have high expectations for any relationship you're in.
However, you tend to hold back a part of yourself.

Best matches: ENTP and ENFP

What's Your Love Type?

You Are a Good Girl

You are 70% Good and 30% Bad
Generally speaking, you're a very good girl.
(But you don't have us totally fooled!)

Are You a Good Girl or a Bad Girl?

You Are An Attention Seeker

You're only human, so you can't help but want a little attention every now and then.
You love the spotlight, but only when it's well deserved. You'd hate to be known for the wrong thing.
And you also don't mind sharing the spotlight. You can easily give someone else credit or a complement.
You know there's enough attention to go around, and it makes you happy when your friends shine.

You come across as: Friendly and interesting

People may wrongly think you're: A little more modest than you actually are!

Are You An Attention Whore?

Your Ideal Hairstyle:

Sliced Layers

What Women's Hairstyle Is Right For You?

You Are Jennifer Aniston

Girl next door with a free spirit.
You're low key and naturally sexy.
Sweet and approachable, people are attracted to your upbeat attitude.
And even when life doesn't go your way, you always eventually turn things around.

Are You More Like Jennifer or Angelina?

You Are 24 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

You Can Hang With the Guys and the Girls

You've struck a good balance between girlie and laid back.
You can keep it casual but when you dress up, you are as girly as the next girl.

How Feminine Are You?

You Are A Realistic Romantic

It's easy for you to get swept away by romance...
But you've done a pretty good job keeping perspective.
You're still taken in by love poems and sunsets
You just don't fall for every dreamy pick up line!

Are You Romantic or Realistic?

You Are a Strawberry Blonde

Men see you as flirtatious, but they also see you as a challenge
Because you're totally fearless and carefree
You've got the lightheartedness of a blonde, with the attitude of a redhead

How Blonde Are You?

Your Pimp Name Is...

Princess Mystery

What's Your Pimp Name?

Your Love Life is Like Titanic

"Promise me you'll survive. That you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless."

You think that you only really have one true love in your life. And that you better to anything and everything to be with that person.
You tend to be very nostalgic about past loves that didn't work out. There are many secret feelings that you keep to yourself.

Your love style: Deep and emotional

Your Hollywood Ending Will Be: Bittersweet

What Movie Is Your Love Life Like?

You Are a Red Wine Woman

You're not a big drinker, and when you do drink, you go for the best.
You probably know a good deal about wines, and you know how to order a great bottle.
When you drink too much, you tend to flirt - but only in a subtle, understated way.
You prefer to date a man who's worldly and wise. He's got to be as sophisticated as you are.

What Kind of Drinking Woman Are You?

You Are a Strawberry Daiquiri

You're a fun, playful drinker who loves to party.
You may get totally wasted, but you're always a happy drunk!

What Mixed Drink Are You?